The Superficial - Because You're Ugly |
- The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 10.23.12
- Christina Aguilera’s Last Album Is From The Future So That’s Why No One Bought It
- Folks, We’ve Got A Jon Hamm’s Penis Sighting
- Here’s Why You Saw Natalie Portman Looking Crazy Hot At The Texas/Baylor Game
- James Franco Hooked Up With Not-Selena Gomez-or-Vanessa Hudgens From ‘Spring Breakers’
- Kanye West Was Supposed To Propose To Kim Kardashian On Her Birthday, Didn’t
- Oh, Good, Lindsay Lohan Tweeted The Debate
- The Full ‘Iron Man 3′ Trailer’s Here Already
- Did Jennie Garth Always Have These? And Other News
The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 10.23.12 Posted: 23 Oct 2012 02:00 PM PDT Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, brought to you by Pube Beards™ — Now available in Welcome To Whole Foods! We’ve also got two straight dudes just doing straight dude stuff, as well as Russell Simmons continuing his Eastern European humanitarian mission, and finally, oh snap, did Jaleel White do that? *slowly backs out Read More ... |
Christina Aguilera’s Last Album Is From The Future So That’s Why No One Bought It Posted: 23 Oct 2012 01:09 PM PDT “Ohmygod, I haven’t eaten all day. Just one bite…” “What did you say, mama?” “Nothing!” Seen here taking her moleman/human hybrid son Max to the Pumpkin Patch because he always burrows out the best ones, Christina Aguilera‘s last album Bionic barely sold 300,000 copies, and as she gets ready to release Lotus next month, she’s Read More ... |
Folks, We’ve Got A Jon Hamm’s Penis Sighting Posted: 23 Oct 2012 12:25 PM PDT Wanna get lost in your mind for a while? Ask yourself who the water bottle’s for. Earlier today on Facebook, one of the few Southern Republicans I actually like commented that because I posted about Kim Kardashian, I owe the ladies some Hamm-bone which I was going to point out is entirely up to the Read More ... |
Here’s Why You Saw Natalie Portman Looking Crazy Hot At The Texas/Baylor Game Posted: 23 Oct 2012 11:19 AM PDT If you caught the Texas/Baylor game Saturday, you probably found yourself wondering, “Why am I looking at super-stacked Natalie Portman with blonde hair blocking Mama June’s vagina?” Turns out she was in town filming that new Terrence Malick movie where she’s Sookie Stackhouse. And just to keep this post educational, not only did her breasts Read More ... |
James Franco Hooked Up With Not-Selena Gomez-or-Vanessa Hudgens From ‘Spring Breakers’ Posted: 23 Oct 2012 10:07 AM PDT This one. He’s banging this one. I think I got all this right, but if I didn’t, blame this shitty Lisa Frank notebook that’s not even college ruled. Oh, wow, there’s a unicorn on you. How about not having 20 feet between each line? Goddammit. Anyway, Ashley Benson was dating Justin Bieber totes BFF Ryan Read More ... |
Kanye West Was Supposed To Propose To Kim Kardashian On Her Birthday, Didn’t Posted: 23 Oct 2012 08:54 AM PDT Over the weekend, Ryan Seacrest hinted heavily that the evil he inflicted upon America would soon shat out another wedding thanks to Kanye West proposing to Kim Kardashian on her 32nd birthday this past Sunday. Except none of that happened, and instead Kanye just flew to her Italy where he banged her without making her Read More ... |
Oh, Good, Lindsay Lohan Tweeted The Debate Posted: 23 Oct 2012 07:39 AM PDT Lindsay Lohan spent a good portion of the 2008 election trying to convince her girlfriend Samantha Ronson that she understands politics, so in an attempt to relive that tradition, Lindsay spent last night at a sushi bar (No, really.) live-tweeting the presidential debates if live-tweeting means making no goddamn sense and trying to get Bill Read More ... |
The Full ‘Iron Man 3′ Trailer’s Here Already Posted: 23 Oct 2012 06:07 AM PDT I’m not sure what the marketing plan is for making a 17-second teaser for a trailer you’re releasing barely a day later, but if it involves giving nerds on the Internet blue balls than going, “Just kidding, robot handjob?” mission accomplished. So here’s the full official trailer for Iron Man 3 which reteams Robert Downey Read More ... |
Did Jennie Garth Always Have These? And Other News Posted: 23 Oct 2012 06:00 AM PDT - This review of Taylor Swift‘s new album that’s entirely about Jake Gyllenhaal has me certain they never dated as much as he opened a car door for her which she interpreted as they’re married. - Iranian Facebook chicks are terrible. I’m now onboard with bombing them. - Honey Boo Boo shuts Read More ... |
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