Cele|bitchy |
- Peaches Geldof at the ‘Prometheus’ premiere: lovely or skinnier by the day?
- J.Lo let Casper Smart in a meeting w/ Fox execs, he told them she doesn’t need Idol!
- Zhang Ziyi thinks a “rival actress” is spreading the high-class prostitution story
- Did Jennifer Aniston send Angelina Jolie $1000 worth of passive-aggressive flowers?
- Jessica Simpson started having sex three weeks after her C-section
- Star: Eva Mendes wants Ryan Gosling’s baby & she’s already off The Pill?
- Halle Berry will call the pap she cursed out to testify in her case: did she set it up?
- Charlize Theron vs. Noomi Rapace: who looked hotter at the ‘Prometheus’ premiere?
- Is Katie Holmes “devastated” by Tom Cruise’s “sexy” W mag rock star shoot?
- Michael Fassbender at the UK ‘Prometheus’ premiere: undeniably gorgeous?
| Peaches Geldof at the ‘Prometheus’ premiere: lovely or skinnier by the day? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 08:33 AM PDT I always find it strange that Peaches Geldof gets invited to the big London movie debuts, but regardless of the reason, she showed up to the Prometheus premiere with her baby daddy Thomas Cohen in tow. Poor Thomas always dresses like an old man, but he’s really only a 20-year-old, baby-faced dude who looks (as many of you have pointed out) like a young Bob Geldof. Speaking of Bob, I like to imagine that he’s been doing quite a bit of babysitting these days (while refusing to say Astala’s name) as his daughter begins to hit the town again, which is probably quite the frustrating experience for the old curmudgeon. Anyway, Peaches is still looking spookily skinny after a mere month of postpartum existence. I’ve been unable to find a designer ID on this silvery, shimmering dress, but that’s not surprising since Peaches attends all the fashion shows but rarely wears the goods. She’s more of a vintage shop type of girl, and this dress is kind of pretty, but Peaches herself looks like a corpse. While I’d hope that her look is merely the result of sleepless nights with a new baby, it’s hard to tell with Peaches, who has a history of … bad habits. Her hair is appropriately mussed for the dress, but the powdery makeup is a total disaster. Also, this isn’t really the rack of a breastfeeding mother, right? Minnie Driver walked the red carpet in a Temperly gown that was a full-length, long-sleeve, French-lace number with a green lining peeking through from underneath. Her look is very glamourous with pulled-back hair and bold lipstick to match. While Minnie does look good here, she’s also very “tight” and shiny in the forehead area. She’s definitely hitting the ‘tox. Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN             |
| J.Lo let Casper Smart in a meeting w/ Fox execs, he told them she doesn’t need Idol! Posted: 01 Jun 2012 08:03 AM PDT
We’ve already heard that Lopez has pitched and sold a reality show for Casper to the Oxygen Network. We’ve also heard that Casper is giving Jennifer business advice, against the wishes of Medina and her other advisers, including telling her to ditch her plum Idol gig and focus on other endeavors. (Him.) The National Enquirer, which has run several insider stories on this relationship, claims that Lopez went so far as to let Casper attend a meeting with Idol executives, which he f’ed up for her royally. It’s not a done deal that Lopez is off Idol, it still seems to be up in the air officially, although we’ve heard rumors for weeks about it. Casper might have just cost her the $10 million a year job that helped re-launch her flagging career. Here’s more:
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, June 11, 2012] Let’s imagine, for a moment, that Jennifer was just a mid-level manager at say, a tech company. (To use a sector I know.) Let’s say she was newly divorced and brought her new, cocky 25 year-old boyfriend in to a salary negotiation with her. The whole company would be talking about her and she’d probably lose her job. Maybe this is a bad comparison, since average office workers don’t have career managers, but you know where I’m trying to go with this. This is so stupid, unprofessional and insane. She’s paid millions of dollars to work on a television show and she already has a well established, well respected manager who knows the industry. She’s so idiotic in love that she’s mixing her lovelife with her career and massively ruining it. Just dumb. It makes me wonder how she got this far, when she’s making such obviously bad decisions. These photos are from 5-26-12. Credit: WENN.com and FameFlynet    |
| Zhang Ziyi thinks a “rival actress” is spreading the high-class prostitution story Posted: 01 Jun 2012 08:03 AM PDT Many of you wanted to discuss Lainey's take on the Zhang Ziyi (alleged) prostitution scandal – go here to read Lainey's post and alternate theories on what's really going on there, including some interesting insights in the Communist Party's power and what kind of illicit deals they can make. Lainey suggests that perhaps Zhang is not really a prostitute, but she was "made" to give sexual favors to powerful men under threat. Whether Zhang's career was threatened, or whether she or her family were threatened with bodily harm… it's an interesting theory. I do think the Bo Xilai situation is much more complicated than we know, and I think this Zhang Ziyi-prostitution storyline is probably a distraction from a larger, more important story about murder, government corruption in Beijing, a larger cover-up and the top-down disorganization of the Communist Party. For now, though, Zhang Ziyi is being very careful to avoid all of the conspiracy theories involving important people. According to Page Six, Zhang is prepared to believe the prostitution story was spread by a rival actress:
[From Page Six] Side-eye at Gong Li? Yeah… perhaps. I think Zhang Ziyi WISHES and HOPES this was all just girl-on-girl hate, but I think this is probably just a cover story, an alternate-universe theory that might become the "official" storyline. It will be interesting to see if Zhang actually follows through on her threats to sue, and if she does, it will be interesting to see that play out. I have to admit…I'm not sure if I'm sold on seeing Zhang as a total victim of powerful, corrupt individuals. After I read Lainey's take, I was reminded of a recent episode of Frontline which documented China's most famous artist/activist, Ai Weiwei – go here to watch the Frontline piece. The Communists, it seems, are terrified of Ai Weiwei, and they've even gone so far as to destroy his Beijing studio, throw him off of his government-sanctioned 2008 Olympic projects. They've surrounded his compound with surveillance cameras and he was once beaten up by local police officers. Last year he was arrested and held for several months, only to be released. But you know what? Ai Weiwei is still alive. He's still an activist/artist, and one of the most beloved and respected people in China. He's still allowed to exist and create and speak. So… while I think the China's Communist Party are corrupt and powerful, they are not all-powerful monsters who can do whatever they please. I don't know though… I still think there's a good chance Zhang was actually a high-class hooker who got some serious money for her time. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Did Jennifer Aniston send Angelina Jolie $1000 worth of passive-aggressive flowers? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 07:09 AM PDT The Enquirer has two Angelina Jolie stories this week, but I only found one of them interesting. One is about Angelina being a closet Buddhist who gets advice from a Buddhist astrologer to help her select important dates in her life. Obviously, she's tasked this astrologer to discover the perfect wedding date. There's no mention of when that date will be, so let's move on to the other story. The Enquirer claims that shortly after Jennifer Aniston "collapsed" when she heard of Brangelina's engagement, Aniston then called 1-800-FLOWERS and had some orange lilies (check out what that means) delivered to the Brangelina abode. Angelina took one look at Aniston's flowers and snorted-cackled with derision. It was the most bone-chilling sound The Villainess Jolie had ever made. Then The Villainess picked up the phone and called Poor Jen so they could arrange a sit-down. IN HELL.
[From The Enquirer, print edition] Wouldn't it be wonderful if – instead of a sit-down lunch – Angelina and Jennifer continued to passively-aggressively send flowers to each other for years and years? I'm seeing dead black roses (signed “The Leg”), and I'm seeing it quickly escalating until they're actually sending each other decapitated voodoo dolls and flaming dog sh-t. Anyway… "Angelina will be going on the attack about Jen always playing the victim – and Jen is going to blast back to Angie for being Hollywood's greatest husband stealer." Hollywood's greatest husband stealer? Jesus. I hope neither of them really talks like this. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Jessica Simpson started having sex three weeks after her C-section Posted: 01 Jun 2012 05:33 AM PDT You knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. All of us knew that it was going to get really gross. Jessica Simpson's TMI-extravaganza began while she was still pregnant – the straw that broke the camel's back for me was when Jessica started talking about her excess amniotic fluid, and how when her water broke is was going to be like a Biblical flood. I was actually okay with Jessica's TMI about pregnant sex – although her TMI about postpartum sex might be… unappetizing to some people. Yes, for Jessica's People Magazine cover – which includes baby Maxwell's first public photos – Jessica gave an extensive interview about diet, exercise, her Weight Watchers endorsement and… SEX.
What are the chances that Jessica ends up getting pregnant right away, like Tori Spelling did when she and Dean began having sex just weeks after she gave birth to her third child? I don't even know. I imagine that having sex just a few weeks after a C-section is… simply NOT HEALTHY. Do you even have the stomach to hear more from Jessica? Here are some more highlights from Jessica's People Mag interview, plus some other stuff:
[Via Us Weekly & People Magazine] Do you believe Jessica when she claims "I ate very healthy, but I did indulge some of my cravings"? I don't. I think she ate whatever she wanted, which involved McDonalds, ribs, cupcakes, brownies, etc. I know some of you judge her harshly for that, but I can't because… I've never been pregnant, and if I was growing a baby, I would probably eat whatever I wanted too. I don't judge her for her (lack of) diet. I judge her for lying about it. Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, People.    |
| Star: Eva Mendes wants Ryan Gosling’s baby & she’s already off The Pill? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 05:10 AM PDT If this post doesn't get more than 100 comments, I will be SO disappointed. I'm foreseeing a great deal of hate for Eva Mendes in the first round, followed by a second round of convoluted debating about reproductive rights, contraception and third-wave feminism, followed by a third round devoted to how much Ryan Gosling sucks because he's with Eva Mendes. Do not disappoint me, people. Star Magazine reports that Eva Mendes wants to have Ryan Gosling's baby. I KNOW. She wants to gestate a baby gosling (redundant) so badly, she's allegedly issued Ryan a "Put a baby in me or we're over" ultimatum. The kicker – and the buried lede – is that Star Mag's sources claim that Eva is ALREADY gone off The Pill. Flame on, y'all.
[From Star Magazine, print edition] I believed the Us Weekly story a few weeks ago with sources claiming that Ryan "grew distant" with Eva for several months, and they're relationship was in flux. But! I think that photo op they did together in NYC was a public confirmation that they're still very much "on" and very serious about each other. Gosling doesn't do those photo-ops with just any random Disneyland piece. Eva is "special". Special enough to carry a Gosling baby? Hmmm…. Some photos of Eva over the past two weeks – she's been getting pap'd every other day in LA, it seems. Read into that whatever you want. Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.    |
| Halle Berry will call the pap she cursed out to testify in her case: did she set it up? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 04:55 AM PDT
So as you may remember, Halle started yelling at the paparazzi outside her daughter Nahla’s school in early May. This is the first time I’ve seen a video of the incident, and Halle is screaming at the guy while he is sitting in his car. It’s unclear what he did to provoke her, although reports at the time claim that Halle was sick of being stalked outside her child’s school every day. TMZ reports that Halle is going to call that particular pap to the stand in her custody case, in order to establish that he uses aggressive tactics to get photographs of celebrities. They explained on TMZ live that the paparazzo, a guy named Andrew Deetz, is likely to be subpoenaed in order to bring him on, hopefully as a hostile witness. Here’s more:
[From TMZ] On TMZ Live, head Harvey Levin argued that this wasn’t a big setup by Halle to have some “evidence” for her custody case. (That segment is at 2:00 into this video and is well worth watching.) His argument was that this same paparazzo, Andrew Deetz, got in a fight with Britney Spears’ bodyguard back in 2007, in which Deetz accused Spears’ security of beating him up. Levin explained that the photographer has “a history, and he’s considered a very aggressive guy.” Another TMZ staffer asked, very convincingly, what would happen if Deetz argued on the stand that Halle is crazy, and that you can see in the video that she’s going off on him. Levin said this wouldn’t hurt Halle’s case because Deetz “has no ability to say she’s crazy, he’s not around her enough, but he’s the one that chose to go to Nahla’s school and that’s a big no-no. We don’t do that.” The same TMZ staffer pressed the issue, with a point that many of you have made in the past: Gabriel should argue that Halle is crazy based on that video. Levin kept arguing Halle’s side, saying “it’s not an issue of who’s a better parent, the only real issue is, is it safe for Nahla to be in the United States. Is she better off in France?” Then they got into this whole argument, with two different guys saying Gabriel is very cool with the paparazzi and doesn’t have this issue, and Levin saying that Halle will argue that Gabe “parades this kid in front of the press.” We totally know who TMZ’s source is, and that Levin is protecting her. He’s not just playing devil’s advocate. Halle is apparently going to call other witnesses to the stand who will argue that “The French culture is such that photographers generally respect families more.” Levin then explained that Halle gets stalked and followed more than any other celebrity he knows about. Another TMZ staffer suggested she move to Santa Barbara, which is where Oprah and other celebrities live. Again, problem solved, but that’s not Halle’s objective. So let me get this right, Halle lost her cool and cursed out a photographer, who appeared to be sitting in his car and not bothering her at the time. We don’t know what preceded it, and it’s wrong and probably illegal for photographers to follow Halle and her daughter to school. It’s likely outrageous what she has to deal with, and I would probably go off on someone too. Still, Halle is going to use the fact that she got mad at someone and flipped out at them in order to argue that she should be able to move to France. This woman will stop at nothing. Halle is shown on 5-9-12 getting mad at a photographer. Photo credit: Bruja/Juan Sharma, PacificCoastNews.com and FameFlynet. She’s also shown out with Olivier on 5-26-12 and with Nahla on 5-16-12. Credit: WENN.com             |
| Charlize Theron vs. Noomi Rapace: who looked hotter at the ‘Prometheus’ premiere? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 04:35 AM PDT I had too much to say about the photos from the UK premiere of Prometheus, so I had to split these up into two posts. One post devoted solely to my love, my Forever Dong-bot Michael Fassbender. Another post – this post – devoted to fashion and "other". It seems like everybody but Idris Elba came out for the premiere. Charlize Theron was by far the most-photographed, although – as I said previously – Charlize is NOT the lead of Prometheus. Her part is supporting – Noomi Rapace plays the lead character, but the photographers didn't lovingly photograph Noomi's every movement on the (blue!) carpet. As for fashion… Charlize wore this great little Christian Dior dress. It's a great color for her, and her hair and makeup look pretty flawless. Tiny little complaints: I think the bust of the dress is too tight on her or something, because there's something awkward going on there. And I hate the shoes. Noomi wore Valentino, and she actually put some effort into looking glamorous for her big premiere. I think it works. Good (or improved) hair, good makeup, some diamond earrings and a great black gown. Yes, the gown is a bit sheer, but it's not like she's wandering around London in her drawers. I'm also including a small hint of Fassy (sigh…), Guy Pearce (gorgeous), Logan Marshall-Green (meh) and Salma Hayek, who was there for some reason. It just occurred to me that Salma is probably Fassy's type (dark with a sweetshop). It also just occurred to me that Salma + Fassy = one of the best p0rns ever. Jesus, I need a cigarette after that visual. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Is Katie Holmes “devastated” by Tom Cruise’s “sexy” W mag rock star shoot? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 04:28 AM PDT After yesterday’s horrific display from Katie Holmes in the unfortunate skirt/fug booties combo department, I’m almost grateful to return to recycling a photo from Katie’s recent walk of depression and broken promises, which goes right along with a new story from the Enquirer, which isn’t so much Katie’s actual reaction to Tom Cruise’s latest rock star antics on the cover of W magazine but how certain “sources” imagine that she’ll feel after seeing her husband frolicking with two busty blondes, one of whom feigns reaching down Tom’s pants. Imagine for a moment that you are Katie gazing upon this image. If nothing else, this story is a wonderful exercise in anti-Xenu fan fiction because it paints Katie as a jealous, spurned wife when nowhere in reality, fantasy, or contractual existence has Tom ever preferred a “busty blonde” as his “type.” Actually, I’m not sure what his type is, for it’s impossible to draw any significant parallels between Mimi Rogers, Nicole Kidman, and Katie. But busty blondes? Forget about it. Tom is not interested, and he definitely didn’t get a boner when one one of the blondes let a boob slip out during the implied beej part of the shoot. Still, this Enquirer story is almost worth it for the giggle factor involved in Katie’s fictionalized reaction and the made-up quotes about the supposed crush that one of the blondes has on Tom. Bitch, please.
[From Enquirer, print edition, June 9, 2012] I know that a few of you actually liked Tom’s catatonic stare in the W mag photo shoot, but no one went so far as to describe it as an “ultra-steamy” set of photos, right? Tom is just so asexual and anticeptic that the idea that he’s even vaguely erotic in these photos is rather hilarious, and I don’t think Katie would actually ever be jealous of him rolling around with a couple of blondes when it merely means that Tom’s working to keep her shopping budget intact. The Enquirer has a lot of fun with this story though and elaborates about how model Abbey Lee Kershaw delighted in rubbing up against Tom’s “impossibly ripped abs while trailing her fingers seductively into his leather pants” and, in another shot, Abbey Lee “thrusts her breasts against his bare torso and nuzzles his chest” while the other model (Edita Vilkeviciute) “places a bottle of Jack Daniel’s on his crotch.” The Enquirer also talks to marriage “experts” who describe Katie’s alleged furious reaction as “understandable” and that further alleged humiliation will follow since W is a fashion bible, and Katie will “feel as if she’s been made the laughingstock of the fashion world” while she’s struggling to launch the Holmes & Yang line. If anything, Katie should be even more embarrassed by her busted clothes than by her ridiculous husband. Let’s be realistic though — she probably doesn’t care at all about Tom dispassionately staring off into the distance while two blondes make pawing motions for the camera. Even more amusing is the Enquirer’s description of how Abbey Lee supposedly has the hots for Tom (and his stomach) now after their not-sexy shoot: “Word has gotten around the modeling industry that Abbey thought the shoot with Tom was one of the hottest she’s ever done” because “she said that she couldn’t get over Tom’s ripped chest.” LOL. Meanwhile, Bret Michaels is convinced that Tom has modelled his very serious Stacee Jaxx after him. Here’s a tiny story from this week’s In Touch:
[From In Touch, print edition, June 9, 2012] Really? I don’t see Bret in Tom’s version of Stacee Jaxx. If anything, I’m mostly seeing a Jon Bon Jovi/Richie Sambora thing going on. With some really gross abs and a very serious attitude. Because Tom's a cowboy. On a steel horse he rides. Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News and W magazine          |
| Michael Fassbender at the UK ‘Prometheus’ premiere: undeniably gorgeous? Posted: 01 Jun 2012 04:27 AM PDT A love letter to Michael Fassbender… My dearest Michael, I love you so much. Sometimes when I look through new photos of you, I can't breathe properly, which is what just happened as I gazed upon these new photos of you. I love your ginger. I love your beard. I love your beautiful eyes. I love your shark smile. I love that you seem to be covered in cigarette ash and lint on the red carpet for the London premiere of Prometheus. I love that you seem to be making a conscious effort to not pose too closely to Charlize Theron, because I think you realize that she's obsessed with you (and The Fassdong). I don't fault Charlize for her obsession – it makes me feel like she and I have at least one thing in common. Still, that bitch needs to wait in line. Speaking of the Fassdong… I can't help it, I love it too. I almost wrote a love letter to your dong. My apologies. I realize that paying so much attention to your anatomy takes away from your work. I understand that it's no longer funny to you, and you don't want to be seen as a "one trick pony" (even though you're hung like a proverbial horse). I comprehend, although I do think that you’ve contributed to people’s sexual obsessions by talking about “unleashing the beast” and “wrecking the sweetshop.” Be fair now. It’s not ALL on us. That being said, I've been trying to cut back on the Fassdong references, but it's difficult because I really do love EVERY part of you. I could write a love letter to your hands. Or to your shark teeth. Or to your eye crinkles. I hope Prometheus is a big hit for you. I hope the film is so successful that somewhere in Japan, scientists actually begin work on an anatomically-correct Fassy/David dong-bot, which will eventually go to market in America and I can finally have you (or a version of you). I hope you get Oscar buzz for this, or for one of your other films coming out in the next few years. I was very disappointed that you didn't get nominated for Shame, and I know you were too. You'll just have to trust the fact that you are beloved and respected, and pretty much everyone in Hollywood wants to work with you. Please don't work with Charlize again – I don't think she would be able to keep her hands to herself. I hope you won't be offended if I say that right now I'm picturing you rubbing your ginger beard across my stomach. I have to go now… I need to change my panties. Love, Photos courtesy of WENN, Pacific Coast News.    |
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