Crushable

Crushable


Video: Paula Deen Discusses Her Type 2 Diabetes On The Today Show

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 11:37 AM PST

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Famed butter lover Paula Deen gave her first interview on the subject of her Type 2 diabetes diagnosis to Al Roker on The Today Show this morning, and much like a deep-fried donut wrapped in bacon, something about it did not sit right with me.

To her credit, she at least admitted her unhealthy lifestyle was “a piece of the puzzle.” When asked why she waited two years to tell everyone about it, Paula responded that it was a private matter (fair), but also that she had “nothing to give to my fellow friends out there,” by which I’m pretty sure she meant “I hadn’t yet figured out a way to make money off of it,” as the announcement of her diagnosis was timed suspiciously well to coincide with her signing of a multi-million dollar endorsement deal to promote the new diabetes drug Victoza. “I have been compensated, just as you are for your work,” she condescendingly told Al Roker, as if marketing a drug directly to people without medical degrees is in any way a reputable profession.

I think I’ll let (an unusually diplomatic) Anthony Bourdain take it from here:

“When your signature dish is hamburger in between a doughnut, and you’ve been cheerfully selling this stuff knowing all along that you’ve got Type 2 Diabetes… It’s in bad taste if nothing else.”

(Via Videogum)

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Betty White’s Off Their Rockers : Old People Can Get Away With Anything

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 11:34 AM PST

When you look back at the funniest practical jokes on Punk’d, it’s not necessarily the plan or it’s execution that got the laugh; it was the aftermath. Beyonce’s look of horror as she tips the giant Christmas tree onto the kids’ presents. Justin Timberlake’s melt down as they cart off his possessions. On Betty White’s new prank show Off Their Rockers, the actual set-ups are prettying amusing, but the unknowing participants aren’t getting mad at the aged nun nearly running them down in her power chair, they’re laughing. And that, for some reason, takes the fun out of it.

The best part of the show is definitely Betty’s little scenes between prank montages. All she has to do to endear herself to an audience at this point is smile at the camera, but the skits are genuinely funny, although they might give you grandparent-related nightmares. Betty uses her pal’s head as a dart board, sips from a giant wine glass, and seems maybe a little too eager to frost a buff house-guest’s naked chest. Her bits made me wish they’d offered her a sketch comedy show instead of a half-hour of pranks.

The set ups weren’t wholly without laughs, there were a few that really stood out:

When two old men sat on either sides of a college-aged girl and insisted on doing the wave, she gamely joined in. Senior citizens can be so persuasive.

The only time a by-stander got remotely mad was when an older woman at a hot dog stand wouldn’t serve her a soda, eventually abandoning the food cart and flipping the customer off. The woman was agitated that she wasn’t getting her soda, but in the end she was too shocked by the old woman’s actions to get really upset. They should just make all the DMV workers be over eighty, then no one will be able to vent their frustration on the counter workers.

The absolute winner was an old woman stopping a woman in her thirties asking her to decode the sex slang in the text her boyfriend sent her. The woman asked to help looks so uncomfortable and yet so determined to assist the elderly. When she doesn’t know any of the terms she even offers one she does know, “rusty trombone,” though she can’t quite bring herself to define it for Granny. I don’t know if she’s rushing off in the end to finally visit her real grandmother or to spend some time on urban dictionary.

Off Their Rockers is worth watching, but my advice for the show runners in the future: less candid camera, more Betty White.

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‘Brother’ Bill O’Reilly Is Excited He Knows The Difference Between Rappers

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 11:29 AM PST

Can you tell the difference between these two men? If you can’t then you’re not a “brother,” or down with the world of rap. But no worries, Fox’s Bill O’Reilly knows the difference. Why? Because he’s a “brother.

Last night while talking about presidential hopeful Mitt Romney‘s “whiteness,” O’Reilly and fellow old conservative, white guy and frequent Fox News contributor, Bernie Goldberg, got into a bit of a tête-à-tête over who knew their rappers and who didn’t. In an embarrassing moment, Goldberg held up a photo of himself and Ice Cube, but since he doesn’t know his shit, he called the man in the photo Ice-T. We’re going to assume it was the “ice” factor that threw him for a loop.

Goldberg went on to call “Ice-T” one of the most “iconic figures in black culture of music.” This statement is true for both the “Ices,” but if you’re going to pay someone a compliment you might as well get their identity straight. Brother O’Reilly wasn’t down with the confusion on Goldberg’s part. In a move that made conservatives cringe everywhere and fear that O’Reilly might bust out his collection of N.W.A. albums, he schooled Goldberg on the difference between the two rappers.

You don’t know what pride and satisfaction truly mean until you see newly appointed (by himself, of course) Brother O’Reilly interrupt Goldberg by saying “That’s Ice Cube, that’s not Ice-T.” He then continued, despite Goldberg’s insistence that it was Ice-T (although he finally came to his senses):

“That’s just how white you are, Bernie. You don’t know Ice-T from Ice Cube…I’m a brother man, you can’t be doing that to me. I know the Cubes from the Ts.”

It was a classy moment in American history to say the least. Brother O’Reilly and Chillin’ Goldberg continued their insightful views on racism, how Romney is a dream candidate for “the bigoted class,” and how it’s a “shame” that they were having this conversation on Martin Luther King Day.

Ice-T (not Ice Cube, for those of you who are not “brothers”) had this response via Twitter to O’Reilly’s new fancy adjective for himself.

Oh, Brother O’Reilly, you don’t want to fuck with Ice-T. The man plays Fin Tutuola on Law & Order: SVU and we all know he’s way more bad ass than Elliot Stabler. The dude will fuck your shit up and Chillin’ Goldberg won’t be able to save you.

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Mad Men‘s Season 5 Poster Criticized For Looking Like Tragic 9/11 Photograph

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 10:49 AM PST

It seems as if AMC is going the ultra-subtle role in promoting season 5 of Mad Men, set to premiere on March 25: Michael Surtees uploaded this photo to his Flickr, the first official poster… and it doesn’t even mention the show’s title. The network is relying on true fans to recognize a) the typeface in the date and b) more importantly, the iconic image of a man tumbling through white space. After all, the much-applauded opening sequence concludes with the little black-and-white Don Draper falling alongside full-building ads, only to be OK and smoking a cigarette in his favorite armchair.

But so far, the response has been to assume that this poster is hinting at a depressing season 5. Ology makes the argument for someone’s suicide; the lack of any other visuals makes me want to agree. Similarly, Copyranter is criticizing the designers behind this poster for making it look way too similar to the stomach-turning 9/11 photo “The Falling Man.” (Here’s a link to the photo on Wikipedia, since it can be tough to look at.)

A Copyranter commenter points out yet another way that the photo is offensive: Back in 2008, the creative chief of a top Chicago advertising agency jumped to his death. So now the designers have managed to offend New Yorkers who suffered through the September 11 attacks, and advertisers in general.

Creator Matthew Weiner recently teased some of the themes of season 5, including the promise that each character will have to deal with his/her changing world on his/her own. “And the other thing is — and it really just kept coming up and it's actually in the show — I've never talked about this before, where the line is in the show in episode three and it's ‘When is everything going to get back to normal?’” he said at a recent cocktail party.

However, it’s this quote from Weiner that makes us think the season could be as bleak as the poster hints at: “We talked about ‘life isn't fair’ before on the show, but the realization of, like, you really have to deal with your own problems by yourself and other people are not interested—that self-interest can be a surprise, especially if you're trying to be good.”

So let’s keep guessing until the two-hour premiere (which Weiner says will more resemble a movie than two episodes spliced together) on Sunday, March 25.

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Celebrity Lookalikes: One For The Money‘s Jason O’Mara And Gerard Butler

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 09:54 AM PST

When the first trailer for the Stephanie Plum mystery-comedy One for the Money came out, many of us were surprised to see that rogue cop (and Katherine Heigl‘s love interest) Joe Morelli was played by Jason O’Mara (right), more a niche actor than a proven romantic lead. I know that I assumed that the producers would rope in one of the likelier choices, a bigger name like… Gerard Butler, at left.

Now let me say that Jason O’Mara was pitch-perfect as Morelli, and he had better play that role for however many Stephanie Plum movies the studio decides to make. But even now, with One for the Money coming out this week, I’ve had people ask me if Gerard Butler is in it.

Poor Jason has been dogged with comparisons to Gerard since the casting was announced. It doesn’t help that Gerard starred in The Bounty Hunter opposite Jennifer Aniston in 2010; similar to Morelli, his character seemed shifty and wily while evading a hot woman he had a history with. And while Gerard has become a famous face (and body) through movies like 300 and The Ugly Truth, Jason has been patiently slogging along on TV shows like Life on Mars and Terra Nova.

But regardless of the medium, they both developed the same impish grin:

Here’s hoping that with One for the Money, Jason will stop getting referred to as “that Gerard Butler lookalike.”

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Video: Watch Jonah Hill Make Brad Pitt Laugh Until He Cries

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 09:30 AM PST

A video is making the Internet rounds today that’s bound to strike joy into the hearts of all. Said video is a three-minute-long outtake (from the blooper reel included in the Blu-Ray edition of Moneyball) that consists entirely of Brad Pitt laughing at the off-camera antics of Jonah Hill until he is literally in tears. What the heck is Jonah doing? Does it even matter? When Brad Pitt lets fly his handsome, golden mirth, his joy can be felt all around the world.

Jonah Hill had better feel damn delighted about this, as he’s pretty much living the fantasy version of my life wherein I’m a successful comedian who gets to be in movies with Brad Pitt, and Brad Pitt totally gets my jokes and thinks I’m hilarious, and invites me over to his house for lunch with Angie and the kids, and I make Angie laugh too even though she seems a little reserved at first, and the kids, well, that goes without saying. If I can make Angelina Jolie laugh, I can certainly crack up a fucking four-year-old.

(Via Buzzfeed)

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Video: The Origin of Blue Ivy’s Name

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 08:43 AM PST

Someday when post-pregnancy Beyonce emerges, we might learn how she and Jay-Z came up with their daughter’s colorful leafy name. A combination of Jay-Z’s favorite color and Beyonce’s favorite creeping plant? Beyonce’s first choice for a band name before Destiny’s Child was chosen?

We could speculate all day, or simply let DrCoolSex explain where all celebrity baby names come from: a professional naming agency.The agency finds monikers like most expectant parents: the dictionary, boggle, seances. In the end the agency proves that for a child this unique you have to throw away all your formulas, all your methods, and just go with your gut instinct. And always make sure no one at the celebrity day care will have your kid’s name. No one wants a Blanket K. and Blanket C. situation.

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Jay-Z Vows Never To Say ‘Bitch’ Again Thanks To Blue Ivy

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 08:42 AM PST

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Breakup Gallery: Avril Lavigne And Brody Jenner

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 08:43 AM PST

Sad news today, guys. After two whole years of dating (that’s like a hundred in Kardashian years!), Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner have split up. According to Us Magazine, they just couldn’t balance their relationship with their respective career pursuits: her music career, and his being-Kim Kardashian‘s-half-brother career. Let’s look back on some photos of them in happier times and wonder why Brody Jenner is okay with being a professional B-list reality TV person but not a professional boyfriend to an actual celebrity who’s famous for doing something.

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Video: Movie Clips Spliced Together To Sing Lionel Richie’s ‘Hello’

Posted: 17 Jan 2012 08:20 AM PST

Similar to last week’s video of President Obama ”singing” Lady Gaga‘s “Born This Way”, Vimeo user Matthijs Vlot (a.k.a. ant1mat3rie) has spliced together famous movie clips in order to match the lyrics from Lionel Richie‘s signature song “Hello.” If you’ve ever wanted to see Arnold Schwarzenegger, Woody Allen, and Borat singing together, here’s your chance. (What’s especially impressive is that Matthijs didn’t have to find clips for every single word; a lot of these are full phrases strung together.)

And he doesn’t rely just on older movies; there’s Toy Story 3 and Avatar in there, too.

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