Cele|bitchy |
- Scarlett Johansson in D&G at the Met Gala: unkempt or understated princess?
- Renee Zellweger vs. Marion Cotillard in black at the Met Gala: whose hair was worse?
- Beyonce in feathered Givenchy at the Met Gala: just completely awful?
- Gwyneth Paltrow in Prada at the Met Gala: mullet-y fugness or ice queen beauty?
- Kristen Stewart in Balenciaga at the Met Gala: super-cute or super-fug?
- Rihanna in sleek, black Tom Ford at the Met Gala: classy or still trashy?
- Elizabeth Banks in mismatch Mary Katrantzou at the Met Gala: fashion-forward or fug?
- Jessica Biel, bangsy in pale Prada at the Met Gala: busted or pretty?
- Kate Bosworth vs. Lea Michele: who was the biggest try-hard at the Met Gala?
- Cate Blanchett in black, feathered McQueen at the Met Gala: absolute perfection?
| Scarlett Johansson in D&G at the Met Gala: unkempt or understated princess? Posted: 08 May 2012 09:08 AM PDT Last week, Kaiser hit it on the nose with a theory that Scarlett Johansson has (intentionally or not) been systematically killing off her sexiness in regards to her post-Ryan Reynolds (as well as concurrent and post-Sean Penn) red carpet looks. Then Scarlett changed course by bringing it in Preen for her Walk of Fame ceremony. Now I’m fully seeing a glimpse of the old Scarlett; that is, the sexy bombshell who wore red at the 2006 Golden Globes. Remember how even Ryan Seacrest couldn’t resist groping her at that event? That was so gross. Last night, Scarlett wore a fantastic Dolce & Gabbana gown to the Met Gala and is doing the slightly messy (dare I say “bedhead”) locks once again. It’s my favorite hair look on her, and she wears it well. Now it’s fully expected that Scarlett would wear Dolce & Gabbana to the Met Gala since she’s still the face of their cosmetics line. Here the custom-made gown is almost princess-like (but still brings a lot of old-school glamour) with a champagne-colored, tulle skirt and a gold-embellished bodice that perfectly compliments her figure. Like I’ve already said, Scarlett’s piece-y hair is perfectly mussed up for this dress as an updo would’ve been too severe for the overall look. Her makeup also looks beautiful as well with coral-colored lips and understated eyes. Scarlett gives great back view in this dress too. Maybe she’s finally shaken off all of the Sean Penn. One can only hope. Photos courtesy of WENN and Pacific Coast News           |
| Renee Zellweger vs. Marion Cotillard in black at the Met Gala: whose hair was worse? Posted: 08 May 2012 09:04 AM PDT
Also, look at Renee’s styling. Her makeup is nonexistent and her hair looks so messy. I appreciate that she doesn’t wear wigs or extensions, but she could do something much more polished with her short hair. Overall, she looks like a mess. She might have been able to pull off this look with different styling. She’s shown with Peter Dundas, the lead designer for Pucci. Here’s Marion Cotillard in ombre black to purple Christian Dior, also with plain lines. It’s not a terrible dress, but I really dislike sheer overlays on top of miniskirts. It looks bizarre. There are too many trends going on here at once: a color change, some sparkles, and a sheer skirt. Plus I’m wondering about the logistics of that dress. Does she have on little booty shorts underneath? It’s hard to tell where the dress ends and her legs begin. Marion has those itty bitty bangs that define Kaiser’s “bang trauma.” They highlight her gorgeous face, and make her look pixie-ish, but they also look like a mistake at the hairdressers. I do like her makeup a lot, though. Her makeup artist got the look just right – he/she emphasized Marion’s eyes and went with a nude lip. She’s so pretty. Also in black looking like she’s about to sport dreds is Mary-Kate Olsen. I didn’t spot either of her sisters there in the photos we have. Mary-Kate is wearing a shapeless geriatric-looking black sack of her own design. At least it’s from her label, The Row. Her makeup makes her look like a gothic succubus. As an aside and palette cleanser, Dianna Agron wore Renee’s (former) go-to designer, Carolina Herrera, last night and she looked great. The dress could use a pop of another color, maybe at the belt, but this is lovely on Dianna. I like her hair and makeup too. Photo credit: WENN, PRPhotos and Pacific Coast News                 |
| Beyonce in feathered Givenchy at the Met Gala: just completely awful? Posted: 08 May 2012 08:25 AM PDT Beyonce flew solo at the Met Gala last night. And by "solo" I mean without Jay-Z, because I'm pretty sure Bey had some stylists and feather-fluffers around her. Beyonce wore this feathered Givenchy MESS. I know I said Sofia was one of the worst looks (and she was), but can we all agree that Beyonce was probably THE worst of the evening? OMG. I can't even believe what I'm seeing, that's how bad it is. I feel like I'm hallucinating. And just think… last year, Beyonce tried to do the "show-stopping" look of the night too – remember her vinyl dress which was so tight, she couldn't even move? Think about that timeline too… Beyonce was "pregnant" at last year's Met Gala. And now, just a few months after "giving birth," Beyonce is at the gala once again, flashing all of her bits and pieces. Shall we really go through all of the parts of this dress which are made of hideousness? Here's an honest question: if you took off the purple feathers, would you like this dress more? Obviously, the purple feathers are a fug bridge too far, but even without them, I would hate this look. It's too sheer, especially from behind. The sleeves and the bodice look too lingerie-y. And the lining throughout the bodice just looks cheap and swimsuit-y, like it was added as an afterthought. Two more things: the dress has built-in gloves. Is that what it's called? The sleeves are gloves. Sleeve-gloves. The effect is cheap. Second thing: I really dislike Beyonce's blonde ponytail. I feel like it's the same hairstyle Gwyneth Paltrow did for the Oscars. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Gwyneth Paltrow in Prada at the Met Gala: mullet-y fugness or ice queen beauty? Posted: 08 May 2012 08:14 AM PDT Gwyneth Paltrow attended last night's Met Gala, of course. She comes nearly every year, because it's like the Mecca of Fashion Girls. Last night's theme was "Schiaparelli and Prada ‘Impossible Conversations'". So of course Dame Paltrow wore Prada, instead of her usual ass-kissy Stella McCartney. I actually thought this Prada WAS Stella at first, just because it seems like the cut is off somehow, which seems a hallmark of Stella McCartney's designs: a bad fit. Anyway, this dress is like the fancier cousin of the mullet dress – it has the soul of a mullet dress, yet I would not really say that it's a full-on mullet. The color – a pale, icy white-blue-silver (depending on the light) – seems pretty obvious for Goop. She loves her icy, artic colors. Thoughts on the side-boob? I really do think she had a boob job. Thoughts on the short dress to a gala event? Eh. Gwyneth wasn't the only girl going with a shorter dress. I think if you're ever going to wear a full-length gown, it should be to the Met Gala (and the Oscars), but I guess Goop considers herself to be a "fashion risk taker" and "rule-breaker". Plus, she fancies herself ahead of the curve, mullet-wise. Overall, though, I don't really hate this look on Gwyneth. It's not groundbreaking, and it's not surprising. It's also not bad. The fit could be better, but… I don't have a hate-on for it. Goop's shoes are Prada too, by the way! I really like her shoes, they might be my favorite part. My least favorite part? Her hair. She needs to stop with the center part. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Kristen Stewart in Balenciaga at the Met Gala: super-cute or super-fug? Posted: 08 May 2012 08:08 AM PDT Kristen Stewart attended the Met Gala last night. Do you find that shocking? You shouldn't. Kristen is now the face of Balenciaga, and Nicolas Ghesquiere (I think that's him) was her date. So… what do I like about this look? Two things. One, I really like her hair. It's not particularly high-fashion or anything, and yes, it's not right for the event, but I think her hair looks great here. Great color, great body, and I just love the curl. Two, I like that Kristen is actually trying, experimenting and having fun with fashion. She's young – she has time to make big fashion mistakes, and I do like her more for trying. That being said, this look is awful. Everything is just horrible – and it's not Kristen's fault. Sort of. I would imagine that as Ghesquiere's date/muse and the official face of Balenciaga, Kristen would have had her choice, her pick. I don't believe that Ghesquiere MADE her wear this. But he probably encouraged it, which makes this mostly his fault. As a designer, I feel he should have made a real choice here: color-block or reptile print. NOT BOTH. Put the two together, and you've just made a pretty young woman look like a color-blind crackie. Also terrible: Kristen's shoes. It looks like she's wearing her beloved Converse, only in hideous bandage form. Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News, WENN.    |
| Rihanna in sleek, black Tom Ford at the Met Gala: classy or still trashy? Posted: 08 May 2012 08:03 AM PDT In a rare move, Rihanna toned down the sleaze and brought the glamour at the Met Gala. Is anyone else surprised that she’s not wearing tacky, cheap Stella McCartney like she did at last year’s event? I wonder what the story is there because RiRi usually loves her oddly-shaped, ill-fitting Stella designs. Strange. For last night’s event, Rihanna wore a Tom Ford gown in a black crocodile-like fabric that was not only backless but was probably sewn onto her, never to be removed again. That body! Rihanna was covered up, but every nook and cranny is clearly visible, and the overall effect is surprisingly tasteful. The black nails are a little bit too much, but it’s the Met, so she gets a pass this time. To fully appreciate the shape of the dress on Rihanna’s body (and the Christian Louboutin heels), check out the side view. Here’s the mid-length view, where you can really see how the fabric of the dress pops against the flashbulbs. Rihanna’s makeup was quite simple with shades of nude for the lips and cheeks and a slightly more daring job in the eye department. She’s got such great bone structure. Here’s the part of the dress that I like the most — the very dramatic back view. It’s sexy without being trashy and the way I wish Rihanna always dressed. Photos courtesy of WENN and Pacific Coast News          |
| Elizabeth Banks in mismatch Mary Katrantzou at the Met Gala: fashion-forward or fug? Posted: 08 May 2012 07:46 AM PDT
So it’s confusing to me that she chose a Mary Katrantzou contrasting pattern dress, to put it kindly, that comes off as cacophonous it’s so loud. Without the rounded capelet thing at the arms, and without the peplum “dust ruffle” bit around the waist, it might have worked. Even the slit straight down the front looks out of place. As it is, she just looks a little mortified in that dress, doesn’t she? It’s like her expression is apologetic and sad. Banks’ shoes are kind of awesome at the rare moments they’re peeking out. Check out the sequin heels with the thin black straps. I love her blush-colored toes and nails, which match her peachy lips. Her makeup is very pretty. Her hair just looks greasy and like an poofy afterthought, though. It’s a shame because she’s really worked some fashion-forward looks in the past. This designer just failed her. photo credit: WENN.com    |
| Jessica Biel, bangsy in pale Prada at the Met Gala: busted or pretty? Posted: 08 May 2012 07:41 AM PDT Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake walked their first red carpet as an engaged couple at the Met Gala. I've been trying to think about all of the insults I could hurl at them, but honestly, I think they're both doing pretty good for who and what they are. Do I wish Jessica Biel would stop trying to make these "shaggy dog" bangs happen? Yep. Do I wish her hem wasn't so confusing? Yep. Do I wish that Justin had given Jessica a prettier engagement ring? Yes. Do I think Justin is smug and full of it? Of course. But for what they are – an attractive couple who fancy themselves "fashion royalty" while consistently missing the mark – they're okay. Jessica's dress is Prada. I actually kind of like it. Right? It's simple – perhaps too simple for the event, but it flatters her figure, and I kind of love the bejeweled pattern. I like how she put together her look too – the lime green Prada clutch and the pink shoes are lovely with the dress. Basically, my only problem is with those God-awful bangs. Can you feel my eye twitching? Bangs like this always make me twitchy. Rose Byrne was doing a very similar hairstyle throughout this year's awards season… so not only does Biel look awful, she's not even ORIGINALLY awful. As for Justin… eh. Meh. I don't get why girls are on his jock, ever. But I'm glad that he and Jessica did the red carpet together. That's a nice move. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Kate Bosworth vs. Lea Michele: who was the biggest try-hard at the Met Gala? Posted: 08 May 2012 07:38 AM PDT I barely know what to say about these two girls, Lea Michele and Kate Bosworth. I kind of wonder why I've never thought about comparing the two of them before. They're very similar – in that they both approach the red carpet with a sense of hunger. Actual hunger, because, let's face it, there are real concerns about when these two ever eat solid food. And metaphorical hunger, the hunger for fame, the hunger to be recognized, the hunger for acknowledgement that they are truly fashionable girls. Lea Michele wore Diane Von Furstenberg – it's kind of boring, but I genuinely like this on Lea. It flatters her figure, the color is great on her, and she styled it beautifully with the matching clutch (too matchy-matchy, but I think it's fine) and the drop necklace. Great hair too. As for Kate Bosworth in feathered Prada. You know what the worst part is? Sienna Miller did this look in a now-infamous Vogue spread in 2007 (infamous because it was the subject of The September Issue). Sienna was styled with an extremely high, tight bun, and the theme of the pictorial was "feathers". Why is The Bos so dated? Why is she the most boring feathered person there? Why did she choose that lip color? So… The Bos is my choice for the most try-hard person in this post. Lea Michele's hungry, as always, but The Bos was a disaster. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Cate Blanchett in black, feathered McQueen at the Met Gala: absolute perfection? Posted: 08 May 2012 07:13 AM PDT Cate Blanchett to Beyonce: GIRL, THIS IS HOW YOU DO FEATHERS. My girl Cate Blanchett is just perfection, isn't she? Blanchett wore a Fall 2012 Alexander McQueen – which surprises me a little bit, because Cate was really close to the late Alexander McQueen, and if she was going to wear something McQueen, I would have thought it would be something vintage. But now we know – Cate supports Sarah Burton, the line's new head designer. Cate was Burton's first choice, apparently. They were each other's dates. Look, on another woman, this look would have been a total disaster. But I love this on Cate. As it always with Cate, it's simply about how she wears it. She can pull off the strangest thing, and she never lets a dress wear her. Look at the detailing on this dress too – the whole thing is made of those rich-looking feathers. You seriously need to go back and look at Beyonce's tacky monstrosity of a dress, then come back and look at this. Beyonce = Busted, Budget, Las Vegas Diva. La Blanchett = Beautiful, Perfect, Classic, Amazing Style Icon. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
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