Doesn’t it seem like the Duggars are taking it up a notch recently? They’re letting their [fill in the blank] flag fly. (There are all sorts of adjectives that come to mind to put before “flag,” and I’m sure you can come up with plenty too. “Freak” is too easy.) In December, after Michelle Duggar sadly miscarried her last pregnancy around her 19th week, she recorded a public message to the baby she lost that included an awful lot of pro-life rhetoric. She said, in part, “So often in society babies are looked upon as a problem, trial or responsibility, but God says babies are a blessing. We do not believe that babies are a bother, a headache or a financial drainer or a career interrupter.”
Well now Michelle has a message for the wives of the world. We should ditch all our girlfriends and never ask anyone for advice except our husbands. We should never question anything our husband does and let him have the final word on everything. Michelle said all this on her reality show, “19 Kids and Counting.” Radar has the details:
* A Husband Needs A Wife Who Accepts Him As A Leader And Believes In His God-Given Responsibilities": Husbands are commanded to govern their wives; God works through a man's decisions — good or bad; Bad decisions reveal his needs and allow the wife to appeal and demonstrate Godly character; The more a wife trusts her husband, the more careful he will be in giving her direction; Never ask others for counsel without your husband's approval; reassure your husband that you understand and believe that he is your God-given leader.
* A husband needs a wife who will continue to develop inward and outward beauty: How can you become more of the wife of your husband's dreams?; discover and conform to your husband's real wishes; explain your hairstyle to others on the basis of your submission to your authority; separate your "rights" from your responsibilities.
* Ask your husband to define your responsibilities; Ask your husband to tell you when you have a resistant spirit; dispel a backbiting tongue by silence.
So is Michelle saying that Jim-Bob is responsible for that awful 80s hair she has and that she’d like to change it? I just kept focusing on this line “explain your hairstyle to others on the basis of your submission to your authority.” It’s bizarre. If you read between the lines on that first bullet point, it sounds like she saying that you should let your husband do a bunch of stupid sh*t on his own so that you can ultimately get your way, but maybe that’s wishful thinking on my part. Overall it reads like antiquated ridiculous pap. A women’s place is in the house doing whatever her husband wants, dressing and looking exactly as he wants and being available for sex all the time without birth control.
I hope that in practice this isn’t actually how this woman lives. In a different family dynamic where the man is abusive, her advice could be quite harmful. That’s all on the wife, though right? She’s just supposed to take it without question, never talk back or leave, and just pray that the man treats her better.
I shouldn’t put so much emphasis on the stupid crap this woman says. She’s got some competition coming in the enormous family reality show circuit, and she knows she’s got to step it up if she wants to remain in the news.
The Duggars are shown at The 2012 Conservative Political Action Conference on 2-10-12. Credit: Mark Wilkins/FameFlynet Pictures
Christina Hendricks has a new, longish interview with The Mirror – you can read the full thing here. You know I like Christina, or Titsy McCleavage-Wall, as I have recently started calling her. I've always liked her, I've always defended her, mostly because I think she's a decent actress, and it's nice to see a woman with a different kind of body type on television, and I enjoy how Christina's figure is so celebrated. That being said, some of this interview kind of pissed me off. Christina is jumping on the "I was bullied" bandwagon, which… I dislike when celebrities do this. I understand that many of them are trying to reach out to young kids who are bullied, and trying to let them know that this too shall pass. But mostly I think celebrities talk about being fake-bullied because they want to position themselves as victims. As for Christina – she was "bullied" because she dyed her hair. For reals.
Christina on being bullied: "My school days were pretty unhappy. I had the worst high school experience ever. I went to a very mean school and was bullied like crazy. I was a bit of a goth with purple hair and I was also part of the drama group, so my friends and I were all weird theatre people and everyone just hated us. There was a long corridor with lockers on either side and kids would sit on top of them and spit on you. It was like something out of Lord of the Flies."
Her family moved to Virginia when she was a teenager: "The girls there had purses and I still had my backpack from Idaho. Moving as a teenager is never easy. So I tried to set myself apart and it ended up with multi-coloured hair. It was how I was expressing myself. I was a goth kid. I dyed my hair about 42 different colours, shaved it at the back and wore black make-up. Kids can be pretty judgmental about people who are different. But instead of breaking down and conforming, I stood firm. That is also probably why I was unhappy. My mother was mortified and kept telling me how horrible and ugly I looked. Strangers would walk by with a look of shock on their face, so I never felt pretty. I just always felt awkward. If I could go back and tell my 14-year-old self anything it would be, 'Don't worry. You're going to be doing exactly what you want to be doing and those people who are a***holes now are still going to be a***holes in 20 years. So let it go!'"
Realizing she was pretty: After leaving school Christina was persuaded to enter a contest to appear on the cover of Seventeen magazine. Wearing a wig she posed for pictures in a cemetery. And even though she didn't win the competition, those photographs proved a revelation. "When I got the pictures back my mum and I started crying because I had no idea I could be pretty," she recalls. "I'd always felt awkward. It was the first time I really felt pretty. It just sort of changed my perspective of myself."
Size: At 5ft 8in tall and weighing 11st, Christina is a UK size 14 and those famous curves reportedly measure 38DD-32-38. But when she started modeling straight out of high school, "I'd done ballet for years and was tiny then, a size 4 [UK size 8], so I didn't have any problems about conforming to a certain body type. As you get older your body changes. I've tried to embrace how I look at every stage."
Gaining weight: "When I was working in Italy I was having cappuccinos every day. I'd take my clothes off in front of the mirror and be like, 'Oh, I look like a woman.' I felt beautiful and I never tried to lose it 'cos I loved it. I was 20lb lighter than I am now, but modelling agencies used to tell me to lose 10, 15, 20lb. I'd be like 'That's bone – I can't. That's not going anywhere!'"
Christina is "credited" with the rise in demand for boob jobs: "I hope I'm not encouraging that. If there's anything to be learned from me it's that I'm learning to celebrate what I was born with, even though it's sometimes been inconvenient. Having larger breasts has made it harder to shop, but I've learned to love it… But now I feel like everyone talks about my bust in public."
I know, I know. She talked about her boobs again. That's something you have to realize about us girls who are well-endowed – we think about our boobs a lot. We talk about our boobs a lot. It's because they feel so big sometimes, we just figure that everyone has noticed them and we might as well talk about them. As for whether Christina's are real (and really 38 DD? – she seems bigger) – she's already claimed hers are real.
Here are some photos of Christina and her husband in London last night. They were photographed leaving the Vivienne Westwood party – Christina is the face of Westwood's jewelry line. I like the way her husband is so supportive of her, aren't you? I think they work together.
I know Kaiser has already covered the photos of Emma Watson in this gorgeous Valentino dress at the Lancome pre-BAFTA party, but she just looks so pretty here that I felt the need to reprise the theme. I mean, she’s still not the most beautiful face in the world, but Emma just has that youthful glow about her and is a very lovely girl. Soon, she’ll probably be playing the role of Belle in Guillermo Del Toro’s reimagining of Beauty and the Beast (she’s in the midst of final negotiations), and she remains the current face of Lancome’s “Rouge in Love” lipstick range.
At any rate, Emma recently sat down with The Independent for a quick chat, which actually occurred on the eve of the pre-BAFTAs event and is just now making it to print. Here are some excerpts:
On make-up: “Make-up is actually something I’ve always really loved. The hair and make-up department on the Potter films were the people who saw me first thing in the morning and last thing at night, so that space was somewhere I felt at home. When we had spare time on set, I’d do their make-up and get them to teach me how to do stuff. I haven’t had my make-up done for two or three month. I know! But it’s really weird for me because I used to have it done every day. So it felt like a treat today.”
On college: “It’s just given me time, really. People use their time at university and at school, which I didn’t have, to really think about and figure out what they want to do, and who they want to be. And it’s been so nice not to be pushed around or pushed into doing things.”
On staying grounded: “Doing the Potters was such a bubble, and then having to figure out how to function in the real world has been a challenge. But it’s been the small successes for me: I know how to use a washing machine, I can cook. It’s worth it to me not to feel disconnected from everything, feeling like I’m in touch with people who do other things than acting or being in the entertainment industry.”
Friends normalize her: “I think humour has been a help. I have schoolfriends, a group of people around me, who have carried me through this whole experience and aren’t fazed if they ask, ‘Oh what are you doing tomorrow?’ and I say, ‘I’m going up to see Mario [Testino] in Notting Hill, he’s shooting me for the new Lancôme campaign.’ I don’t know – it is mad, and some days I feel a bit mad, but it’s the balance that keeps me sane. I don’t fully live it, this side of my life. Some days, for some reason, I can’t go anywhere and I’m like, ‘That was a mistake,’ and other days no one will even notice me.”
Fashion is freeing: “Fashion gave me a chance to feel like I was something outside of Potter,” she explains, of her appearances front row at shows such as Chanel and Burberry. “I’m a multidimensional person and that’s the freedom of fashion: that you’re able to reinvent yourself through how you dress and how you cut your hair or whatever.”
On the reaction to her haircut: “I had journalists asking me if this meant I was coming out, if I was a lesbian now.” She rolls her eyes. “That haircut did make me realise how subjective everyone’s opinion is. Some people were crazy for it and some people just thought I’d lost my sh-t. All I can do is follow my instincts, because I’ll never please everyone.”
I do believe that Emma’s drastic, post-Potter haircut was a pretty big move, but it was largely inspired by the end of her eight-movie contract. Finally, she had the freedom to do whatever she bloody wanted with her hair, and undoubtedly, she was likely tired of having the same Hermoine hair for so many years running. Of course, the danger in a short haircut is getting stuck with a fairly nonversatile style for far too long as well. Still, it’s slightly bizarre that journalists actually questioned her sexuality because of her hairstyle. Nothing really is sacred anymore, is it?
A lot of outlets are talking about this story from last night’s premiere of “Khloe & Lamar.” Now, many people like Khloe (Kaiser likes her) because she stands up for herself and doesn’t seem as insipid as her other sisters. (Probably because she’s not a full-on Kardashian.) I’m still not a big Khloe fan and I find her nasally voice almost as annoying as Kim’s, but not quite. I think it’s an issue of “the lesser evil” with Khloe, but I won’t talk too much smack about her. She does seem decent in comparison to Kim and Kourtney.
So on last night’s “Khloe & Lamar,” Khloe installed a sex swing to liven up her sex life with Lamar. She had a friend put it up, and then Khloe & Lamar promptly broke the thing the minute they tried to use it – which just happened to be captured on camera. If Khloe and Lamar were actually able to christen the swing, would that have been shown on their reality show too? It seems like a ridiculous stunt for ratings, but it worked and we’re talking about it. Here’s more, and the video is above, thanks to Too Fab.
Khloe Kardashian is many things — wife, reality star, entrepreneur — but sex swing installation expert isn’t one of them.
During last night’s season premiere of “Khloe & Lamar,” the Kardashian sister decided it was time to spice things up with hubby Lamar Odom in the bedroom.
Instead of hiring someone to hook up a swing over her bed, Khloe decided to do it herself … with disastrous consequences.
Right as she and Lamar were about to put it to the test, the swing crashed down — with Khloe in it!
“I’m embarrassed and I’m trying to push the limits and do something new,” she said after. “But I’m not a handyman.”
Well they’ve shown bikini waxes on the Kardashian shows, and we’ve seen Kim tell Khloe she has a nice vagina. (That really happened.) So this simulated sex with the sex swing designed to fail is kind of normal in Kardashian world, where people get paid handsomely to overshare.
In related news, Khloe has repeatedly said during the press tour for this season that she never liked Kim’s very recent ex, Kris Humphries, and she even said that she liked Kim better with Reggie Bush, and that Reggie fit in better with her family. (We’ve heard that Reggie and Kim are back together, but he has publicly denied that.) Well it’s not like Khloe pretended to like Kris for the show at all. She was always very vocal about disliking him, and she said it to his face.
Khloe is shown out in NY on 2-15-12. Credit: Enrique RC/Pacific Coast News. She’s also shown with Lamar on 7-11-11 and 12-11-11. Credit: WENN.com and Fame Pictures
First, a little Monaco royal history: Princess Caroline is the oldest child of Grace Kelly (Her Serene Highness Princess Grace) and Prince Rainier. Caroline's younger brother, Albert, just married Charlene Wittstock, and Albert likely hopes to provide a male heir to inherit the throne of Monaco. If Albert does not provide an heir, the kingdom/principality will go to Caroline's oldest son, Andrea Casiraghi. Caroline's second marriage was to Stefano Casiraghi, and the union produced Andrea (the oldest), Charlotte (the middle) and Pierre, the youngest. Pierre is currently… third in the line to the throne, I guess. Because it has to be a male heir, not a female?
Anyway, Pierre has gotten the reputation as an international partier, and Saturday night he was hanging with some friends at Double Seven in Manhattan. According to the New York Post, Pierre and Stavros Niarchos went over to this dude – Adam Hock – who was sitting with some friends and some models. Pierre and Stavroas started acting like jerks, and Hock cold-cocked Pierre. Then everything got crazy:
A vicious fight involving vodka and supermodels at a Meatpacking District nightclub sparked a royal beatdown that landed Monaco's Prince Pierre Casiraghi in the hospital, The Post has learned.
The attack on the 24-year-old son of Princess Caroline and grandson of Grace Kelly came during a late-night confrontation between the prince and his playboy pals and former Manhattan club owner Adam Hock at trendy Double Seven on Saturday, witnesses and law-enforcement sources said.
After the fight, "Pierre's face looked broken, with deep cuts and blood everywhere," said one stunned witness. "He looked like he needed plastic surgery."
Hock, 47, had been partying with friends — including Double Seven owner Jeffrey Jah, hairdresser-to-the-stars Joel Warren and catwalk stunners Natasha Poly, Valentina Zalyaeva and Anja Rubik — when Casiraghi strolled over to their table with shipping-scion pal and Paris Hilton ex Stavros Niarchos III and two other men at around 2:30 a.m., witnesses said. Members of Hock's group said the prince and his entourage "were being completely obnoxious,'' insulting the models and swigging from a $500 bottle of vodka on Hock's table.
"The next thing I saw, all hell broke loose,'' one witness said.
Hock allegedly cold-cocked Casiraghi, sending him sprawling. Casiraghi "fell very badly. He . . . flew across the room and landed on a table on the other side," the onlooker said.
Hock then allegedly punched out Niarchos, 26, and quickly landed blows on downtown hipsters Vladimir Restoin Roitfeld, 27, and Diego Marroquin, 33 — as the flustered models frantically tried to break it up.
Casiraghi was taken to New York Presbyterian/Weill Cornell Medical Center and released later Saturday, sources said.
Hock — the former owner of the Hawaiian Tropic Zone in Times Square — was charged with four counts of third-degree assault for the alleged attacks on Casiraghi, Restoin Roitfeld, Marroquin and Niarchos, whose supermodel girlfriend, Jessica Hart, was with him.
At his arraignment in Manhattan Criminal Court yesterday, Hock said he was the victim.
"I was defending myself and others," he said. "Why aren't [Casiraghi and his pals] handcuffed?"
He was released on his own recognizance and is due back in court next month. Friends of Casiraghi claimed Hock was the instigator.
"The prince walked up to the table, and Adam just slammed him for no reason,'' one witness said. "Stavros jumped in to help Pierre, and then he got slammed in the face."
At one point, witnesses on both sides agree, a friend of Casiraghi grabbed a bottle of Grey Goose vodka from a nearby table and tried to crack it over Hock's head.
Hock's power lawyer, Salvatore Strazzullo, said, "My client was having a nice time with a married couple and a lady friend and a group of very beautiful women, and these individuals were jealous, and they resorted to elementary-school tactics. My client is not Bruce Lee . . . These four guys are trust-fund babies who think the world is owed to them. They are like spoiled brats."
Richard Golub, who is representing the prince and his pals, said, "It was a horrifying incident . . . It was entirely unprovoked."
I tend to believe both sides. I think Pierre and Stavroas were probably acting like entitled d-bags and they went over to Hock's table because they couldn't believe some hot girls were hanging out with the older American men. And I believe this guy, Hock, probably instigated the physical altercation because he decided this little Monaco punk deserved a good old-fashion American ass-kicking. Hock should have been charged with assault, and I'm glad he was. But I don't think Pierre was any kind of victim. He seems like a douche.
Last night, PBS aired the last episode of season 2 of Downton Abbey. The series – about the aristocratic Crawley family before, during and after World War I, is pretty awesome, and if you're not watching it by now… well, you should skip this post. Last year, Downton was a quiet, gorgeous, beloved miniseries which took the UK by storm, and found footing here in America too. By the time the second season aired in the UK, the Brits were Downton-crazy, and the popularity has definitely increased over here, with mixed results. Some critics say that Downton has turned into a total soap opera – they're not wrong. While the first season kept its aristocratic bearings and stayed true to the Upstairs/Downstairs vibe, when the second season came – and with it, the tides of war – everything changed. The characters grew, some becoming worse, some becoming better. The aristocracy is crumbling, the fashions are changing, and the class lines are beginning to blur.
Anyway, we've had some requests for stories about Downton, so here you go. I liked the second season for the most part, with two notable exceptions. First, the Bates/Anna story line got really, really ridiculous and I simply don't care about Bates anymore. Secondly, the whole thing with the little ginger maid who got knocked up out of wedlock? That got super-boring too. But I loved everything about the sisters – Lady Sybil is my favorite, and I like her independence and her easy beauty. But I found myself loving the changes to Lady Mary and Lady Edith too – they both became BETTER women during the war.
Lady Mary – or actress Michelle Dockery – is getting a lot of attention lately. I've seen a lot of photos of her during London Fashion Week, she was just in America solo to promote the series, and now The Mail reports that Dockery/Lady Mary might be getting a Vanity Fair cover. I kind of don't want her to be singled out – if VF wants to recognize Downton, they should put Michelle Dockery with Dan Stevens (Matthew Crawley!). And the Earl of Grantham!! And CORA!!
Michelle Dockery, who plays Downton’s Lady Mary, is set for superstardom in America. The 30-year-old will appear on the cover of May’s Vanity Fair magazine, I can reveal.
‘It’s the big TV issue and Michelle will share the front page with American actresses Claire Danes and Sofia Vergara,’ says my mole.
‘She’s so excited, she says she won’t believe it until she has a copy in her hands.
‘Michelle has turned down request after request from US magazines after Vanity Fair told her they see it as her official US “coming out” moment.’
Michelle with Claire Danes and Sofia Vergara? Okay, that sounds good too. That will be an amazing cover! Sidenote: I love Claire Danes on Homeland. She is AWESOME.
What else would you like me to talk about? Livinia and the Spanish flu? That episode was crazy. Edith and fake Patrick the burn victim? Sybil and the Irishman? I'm trying not to make this too spoiler-y because some of you just haven't finished watching so far. But didn't you love the way season 2 ended? Was it worth it?
PS… Dan Stevens: would you hit it? I would. I LOVE him. When he was getting tingly in his pants, I was all “OH YES!!!!” Plus, he’s a lovely dancer.
I have mixed feelings about director Oliver Stone's politics and his films. I have no doubt that Stone is brilliant – but he's also a historical revisionist, a hopeless self-promoter and a balls-out conspiracy theorist, and sometimes those issues can lead him down some bad paths. I never realized that Oliver had an adult son, though – his son's name is Sean, and he's got a Hollywood career too, sort of. I looked through Sean Stone's IMDB, and it seems like he's a bit actor on his father's films, plus he makes many of the "Behind the Scenes" featurette documentaries for his dad's films. But Sean has a burgeoning career as a director too – he directed a short film a few years ago, and now he's got his first full-length feature coming out, a horror film called Graystone. Sean isn't expecting to work in Hollywood much longer – and his reason might surprise you. Sean has converted to Islam, and he just made a trip to Iran where he discussed his (new) faith and how his faith in Allah is the same as everyone else's faith in a Christian or Jewish God. Sidenote: no one ever includes Hindus in the mix.
Sean Stone, son of controversial director Oliver Stone, converted to Islam in Iran last week and says he's already experiencing a Hollywood backlash. The ceremony was held in Isfahan, where he is researching a documentary. He now goes by the name of Sean Christopher Ali Stone.
He told Page Six: "I've already experienced the reverse of anti-Semitism, having people within the film industry express a reluctance to work with me now that I have said a simple prayer, 'There is no God but God, and Mohammed is his messenger.' I am sure I have [bleeped] off some powerful people."
Speaking over dinner at Barrio 47, Sean told us, "Having read the Koran and having been around the Islamic culture, especially in Iran, I do believe that Mohammed is a prophet of the same god worshipped by other religions. I am of a Jewish bloodline, a baptized Christian who accepts Christ's teachings, the Jewish Old Testament and the Holy Koran. I believe there is one God, whether called Allah or Jehovah or whatever you wish to name him. He creates all peoples and religions. I consider myself a Jewish Christian Muslim."
"What I am trying to do is open up a dialogue about religion. There is such Islamophobia in the West. Islam is not a religion of violence any more than Judaism or Christianity is." He said his dad welcomed the move. My dad said, 'Allah be with you.' My father understands that I am trying to bridge certain gaps and bring about peace."
But he has been shocked by the reaction from others. Sean, about to release his horror movie "Graystone," said, "I didn't realize I would be so vilified. It is almost like I am a criminal for having accepted Islam. I didn't realize Islamophobia was that deep. People have speculated that I have done this because I am from a spoiled family or that I am lost and trying to find myself. That is ridiculous. I don't care if I get criticized. If I can open up a debate about religion and create some understanding, then it is worth it."
When he says something like "I consider myself a Jewish Christian Muslim," Stone is pissing off more people than just Hollywood power players. That being said, I understand where he's coming from, and the context of his message of acceptance and the embrace of our similarities (rather than warring over our differences) is needed more and more in our modern society. I feel like so many people don't even understand that philosophically, Islam's roots are in the Judeo-Christian tradition, and Muslims trace their Biblical ancestry through the same lines as the Christians and the Jews.
And if all else fails, I will be allow myself to be converted personally by Muslim Liam Neeson. But don't mind me – I love my little sandalwood idols of Ganesha.
On Friday, Chris Brown’s people staged these beach photos with his live-in girlfriend, Karrueche Tran, and some friends. (Karrueche is the one with the bleached hair.) His publicist was no doubt trying to underscore this planted story about how he can’t possibly be sleeping with Rihanna again since Karrueche has stayed with him for a few months and is buying his bullsh*t in exchange for a taste of the good life. Well Chris managed to screw up even this simple beach photo op by putting on his crazy face to scare away some seagulls. I’m sure small children in the area were frightened. This only serves to remind us of the reason so many people are against this abusive douche’s comeback.
One of Chris’ most vocal critics in the industry, country singer Miranda Lambert, continues to speak out against him. We’ve already heard that she tweeted after his Grammy win that she didn’t “get it. He beat on a girl.” After that Chris went crazy, as we’ve come to expect from him, and tweeted, in part “HATE ALL U WANT BECUZ I GOT A GRAMMY Now! That's the ultimate F**K OFF!" He later deleted most of his Twitter feed and went silent for a short while, but he couldn’t keep it in for long. First off here’s the story about how Miranda held up a sign at a concert on Thursday that Chris Brown should take notes. This was right before she sang about a woman plotting to kill her abuser.
The music world’s most random feud rages on — with Miranda Lambert stepping up her game by blasting Chris Brown in concert!
The battle began earlier this week, after Miranda Lambert wondered on Twitter why the convicted felon was featured on not one but two performances during the Grammy Awards.
“Chris Brown twice? I don't get it. He beat on a girl,” she tweeted, before adding “Not cool that we act like that didn't happen. He needs to listen to Gunpowder and lead and be put back in his place. Not at the Grammys.”
“Gunpowder and Lead” is Miranda’s single about a woman preparing to kill her abusive husband — and as she got ready to sing the song last night at a UMass concert, she couldn’t help but slam Brown again.
Before singing, Lambert pulled a poster out of the audience reading “Take Notes Chris Brown.”
“Get a good picture now, put it on Twitter,” she said, while holding the poster up. “I've been in a world of hurt with Chris Brown fans lately … but see, I just have to speak my mind because where I come from beating up on a woman is never okay."
As she launched into the song, Lambert added “So that’s why my daddy taught me early on in life how to use a shotgun.” The crowd went wild.
In response to this, because you know that Chris can’t hold his itchy fingers back from responding, hetweeted “Using my name to get publicity? I love it! Perform your heart out! Go buy @miranda_lambert album! So motivational and “PERFECT”!”
Yeah, it’s all about publicity for Miranda. She couldn’t possibly have a very valid point. I’ll just end with my favorite tweet response to Brown’s stupid comeback. “Yep, thank God you punched a woman around so she could use you for publicity, cuz, ya know, Miranda Lambert needs it and all…”
From my understanding, Tina Fey and Lorne Michaels are two of the few people in the industry willing to give Lindsay Lohan a chance. Tina has always been a Cracken apologist, ever since she and Lindsay worked together on Mean Girls. As for Lorne Michael, who is still running Saturday Night Live… well, God knows. Maybe he just takes Tina's word for it. In any case, it was just announced that Lindsay is going to host a March episode of Saturday Night Live. Seriously? Who thinks this is a good idea? Who thinks that this doesn't have "OMG CRACK DISASTER" written all over it?
She may not be landing big screen roles at the moment, but Lindsay Lohan has just nabbed a major gig!
On March 3, the 25-year-old will make her return to Saturday Night Live where she will host for the evening. Jack White will be the musical guest.
This will be Lohan’s fourth time on the NBC late night show — her first since 2006.
The SNL producers should have a ton of material to work with, beings that Lohan has been through a lot since she last hit the stage in NYC’s Rockefeller Center.
In November, Lohan checked in and out of jail (her fifth sentence overall) in under five hours due to crowding. Currently, she is serving the terms of her probation ordered to her by Los Angeles judge Stephanie Sautner, who told the star last month, “keep doing what you’re doing. You appear to be doing very well.”
When Lohan appears in court this Wednesday, she is expected to have completed an additional 15 days of community service at the morgue and five more psychotherapy sessions. If Lohan continues to fulfill her court-ordered obligations, her probation will end March 29.
So her probation won't even be done by then, and she'll be flying to NYC and staying in some hotel for a whole week while SNL is writing skits for her, and she rehearses and stuff. One whole week with professional actors, comedians, writers and producers, all of that attention focused on Lindsay and her crack shenanigans. Ten bucks says she won't even be able to keep it together until then. Even if she manages to get to NYC, her first call will be to her Manhattan dealer and then all bets are off.
Last week, there were some photos of Victoria Beckham during NY Fashion Week where she seemed to look particularly exhausted. Posh generally looks drawn and thin, like she's always subsisting on ice chips and lemon slices, but the recent photos show her with dark circles under her eyes, looking like she was about to simply fall over from the weight on her own head. Well, Posh has heard our comments ("Is she ill? Is that her wax figure?") and she is answering us – she's got a baby who never sleeps and she's working super-hard. So stop saying she looks like hell! Noted, Victoria. Noted.
She has never been one for smiling in photographs, but Victoria Beckham’s public appearances have been particularly pouty of late. But in a new interview, the designer and mother-of-four explains that she is not moody, simply exhausted.
Speaking to the Sunday Mirror, the 37-year-old says: ‘Look, if people want to say I'm miserable then so be it. I'm really not. I have a lot on my plate. I'm not going to lie about it, I'm tired. I'm really tired but I'm also very happy with my life. I'm basically just like any woman who's working and has lots of children – it's tough.’
Victoria tells the paper that the stress of planning her Autumn/Winter 2012 collection for New York Fashion Week and caring for a sleepless infant has taken its toll.
‘I'm not getting much sleep at all, she says. Harper's not sleeping that great, and I've been taking Skype business calls throughout the night too because of the collections. I'm up with the baby as all mums are and I wouldn't have it any other way. There's not a team of people doing it for me.'
Mrs Beckham’s office is London, while she lives in Los Angeles with husband David, Harper and their three sons, Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz. So finding time to speak to her team means many late-night phone calls for the already sleep-deprived star, who says the time difference has become nightmarish.
‘I'm spending ludicrous amounts of time in my dressing gown on Skype talking to my team about the clothes.’
Victoria showcased her latest collection at New York Fashion Week to critical acclaim, before flying to London to attend the launch of her Victoria by Victoria Beckham at Harvey Nichols this week.bbShe joked recently that David has only just realised that designing is an actual job to her, after attending her show in New York.
And it seems the for the foreseeable future, designing will be continue to be her only professional job, as she confirmed that the Spice Girls will not be reuniting for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee this year.
‘It was so flattering to be asked to do the Jubilee, Victoria tells the Sunday Mirror. ‘But we have lots on our plates and we are all so focused on the end of the year and Viva Forever, the musical. The Jubilee isn't going to happen. But the musical is going to be really great and we're focusing on that.’
Do you believe her when she says "There's not a team of people doing it for me"? I kind of do, especially for the mom stuff. I can joke around about Posh and her quirks, but I think she's a very hands-on mother, and I think David is a very hands-on dad too. I think Posh was absolutely thrilled that she finally got a daughter, and she might even be more hands-on with Harper Seven then she was with her sons. Basically, I believe that when Harper cried, her mum comes in and gets her every single time.
As for Posh not having help with her clothing line – that's where I might have to call BS. I think Posh has a fashion eye, I think she's "directing" her multiple fashion lines, and I think she probably signs off on everything before it goes out on the runway. But let's not act like dozens of staffers aren't doing the bulk of the actual work.
Still, I'm sure she loves all of this. She's living her dream – fashionista, respected designer, wife, mother, all of it. She'll find a better balance when Harper starts sleeping through the night.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
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