Crushable |
- Open Letter To Jake Ryan: I Don’t Care If You’re Not Real, My Love For You Is
- Tucker Max Proves You Can Pay Celebrities To Tweet Whatever You Want
- Demi Lovato Neither Confirms Nor Denies The Cocaine Rumors When Talking About Rehab
- OMG: What Did Lindsay Lohan Do To Her Face?
- Joss Whedon Defends Buffy’s Tough Choice In The Season 9 Comic’s Latest Issue
- My Geographically Undesirable, Yet Undeniable Crush On A Musician
- Let’s Discuss How Annoying Vanessa Hudgens Was On Late Night With Jimmy Fallon
| Open Letter To Jake Ryan: I Don’t Care If You’re Not Real, My Love For You Is Posted: 09 Feb 2012 11:46 AM PST
Just thought I’d tell you I’ve been watching you for quite some time now. Since 1984, if we’re going to be honest. Granted at that very, very young age I was unaware of what it meant to be in love, but I did know that something in me sparked whenever you walked on the screen. I’ve yet to find the appropriate word that describes exactly how that spark in me impacted my life and heart. Since the beginning of this unrequited love affair, I’ve been told by skeptics that it will never happen, that I’m just kidding myself, and that the fact that you are just a character in Sixteen Candles should make me understand just how impossible us being together truly is. Damn the critics, I say! I also would like to point them to a little well-known song called “Take on Me” by A-Ha and the video in which he leaps into the comic book to be with his love. The non-believers can put that in their pipe and smoke it. Although, from afar, it may look like Sam is the best match for you, you know, since you’re both characters in the same movie, I would like to stress all the ways in which I’m an even better match for you. Please see below. I’m not 16. Do you have any idea how experienced I am in the sack? OK, not that much, but I’m definitely more experienced than a 16-year-old and could probably give any 17-year-old a run for her money. I’ve never given my underwear away to a geek named Farmer Ted. Yes, I sold a pair of my undies to some guy on Craigslist who was looking to add to his collection, but it’s not like I just handed them over. I’m not related to anyone named Long Duck Dong. This actually might be an issue for you after your intimate run-in with him when he fell out of the tree after your party where he accidentally grabbed your nuts, but maybe not having him as family member could be a good thing, too. My grandparents don’t think you’re a pervert. And I promise, Jake Ryan, no matter what you want to give a try, I’ll never tell them. Sam’s grandparents already pretty much think you’re the devil. My sister isn’t a bitch. Seriously, my sister is quite sweet and didn’t marry into a third rate mafia family. I have my license. Sam still takes the bus. FYI. But since I’m sort of an adult, if your car is in the shop, I can come by and pick you up. My parents never once forgot my birthday, so there’s a good chance that I won’t have any birthday freakouts from emotional damage anytime in the near future. Of course this doesn’t mean I don’t need a happy ending at the end of our movie romance; because I still do, obviously. I think I have made my case. I’ll be expecting you to step out of the television the next time I pop Sixteen Candles in the DVD player. I’m serious. You really don’t want me trying to climb in there. I’m known to make a scene or two when I don’t get my way. xo. Amanda. Related posts: Post from: Crushable |
| Tucker Max Proves You Can Pay Celebrities To Tweet Whatever You Want Posted: 09 Feb 2012 10:59 AM PST
Up until just a few minutes ago, I had nothing positive to say about Tucker Max. He’s misogynistic asshole who’s gotten famous by being a giant dick. However, for the first time ever his douchebaggery did something positive. His Sponsored Tweets book marketing campaign hilariously exposed just how fake celeb’s sponsored tweets really are as well as the lengths they’ll go to make money. In an effort to do some social media marketing for his upcoming book, Hilarity Ensues, he headed on over to Sponsored Tweets. According to Forbes: The company offers a surprisingly easy-to-use service “that allows advertisers to pay powerful Twitter users to run promotions for them. The more followers, the more money: Kim Kardashian can run $10,000, Lance Bass is only $133.” Skipping over the fact that anyone would pay Lance Bass anything to tweet is the fact that you can actually pay for celebrities to say whatever you want them to say. Literally, whatever you want them to say. I knew that people paid celebrities to tweet, but I had no idea that they accepted all tweets, regardless of content. Somehow Tucker Max was one of the first people to figure out this HUGE FLAW in the system and he took full advantage. So much advantage in fact that his wildly inappropriate tweets for several celebs got him banned from ever using the service again. (Check them all out right here.) For some reason they weren’t thrilled to see Kim Kardashian tweet: “Someone handed me Tucker Max’s new book. I did what I do with all big black things I get my hands on: I put it inside my vagina.” Not only did several of his tweets make me laugh aloud, but they also showed me just how desperate rich celebrities are to get richer. Your options on the the homepage of Sponsored Tweets today include: Kim Kardashian, Khloe Kardashian, P.Diddy, Kris Jenner, Snooki, Nick Cannon, Tyrese, Jamie Oliver and the most heartbreaking, Michael Ian Black. (I really thought he was better than that.) Like, really? You’ll hand over control of your Twitter account to a company that lets ANYONE with a credit card endorse things for you. Do you have any concept of pride or dignity? Clearly based on what you let Tucker Max tweet for you, the answer is no. So why are you still reading? Go get your credit card out and go crazy. It’s not everyday you can make Snooki tell everyone to add you on Pinterest.
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| Demi Lovato Neither Confirms Nor Denies The Cocaine Rumors When Talking About Rehab Posted: 09 Feb 2012 10:35 AM PST
Since Demi pulled out of a Jonas Brothers concert tour in 2010 citing exhaustion and personal issues, the main rumor that’s dogged her is an alleged cocaine addiction. In late 2010, RadarOnline claimed that there was a video of Demi snorting coke — following allegations from a fellow partier that she did it “like a pro” — but to the best of our knowledge, no video ever actually surfaced. Regardless, the mental association has stuck: A former child star posted a Reddit AMA a few months back where she claimed that Disney tried to distract from Demi’s coke problem; even though the poster was anonymous, everyone believed her. The MuchMusic interviewer goes by the same assumptions that we’ve all had, mentioning “cross addictions” and asking if Demi’s drug and alcohol problems led to rehab. What’s strange is that while Demi reiterates that she sought treatment for emotional problems only, she never actually denies having problems with drugs and alcohol:
This sound bite hits a lot of the same points that Demi did a year ago, when she was discharged from rehab and did the media circuit. The keywords that have remained? Self-medicating, purging, “drinking and drugs,” “numbing the pain.” As far as I know, she hasn’t yet named those specific drugs. You would think that as an internet-savvy teenager, she would have seen the cocaine rumors and rushed to deny those if they were untrue. However, the 19-year-old was pretty candid when talking about how all of her drinking — especially partying hard during the manic episodes of her recently-diagnosed manic-depression — has been underage: “I really didn’t care about the law at that point. I was trying to numb my pain, and that’s all that mattered.” Something still rubs me the wrong way about them not referencing the BlindGossip fiasco at all. I’d call bullshit on the “recent” timing, but Demi’s red hair seems to match these photos from a Seventeen magazine event in early January 2012. The fact that a popular gossip site called her out directly would have been a fascinating angle to cover; it’s disappointing that no one addressed that. Related posts: Post from: Crushable |
| OMG: What Did Lindsay Lohan Do To Her Face? Posted: 09 Feb 2012 10:12 AM PST
I can’t remember the last time I saw a photo of Lindsay Lohan and thought to myself, “wow, she looks really beautiful, raidant, drug-free and healthy!” Instead it’s more like “gah!” or “eeek” or “why is Dina Lohan photobombing her own daughter?” Sadly, today is no exception to that rule. Linds attended the AmfAR Gala to kick off New York Fashion Week last night and the photos of her are making me question what exactly she did to her face. I can’t quite my finger on it, but it doesn’t look like her. It looks like someone who looks like her. Possibly someone who won some kind of LiLo lookalike radio show in her hometown. But it does not look like the Lindsay we used to see all the time running around town and making a scene. Is it her (new?) nose with the new bump on the tip? Or maybe it’s the glassy, hollow look in her eyes. The stare that says someone used to live in this head and now it’s just filled with visions of illegal powders, Sam Ronson’s fedoras and the best way to affix real human hair to your jacket sleeves. Perhaps it’s the hair. That horrible, horrible blonde hair that makes her look like she runs a meth lab in a Lifetime movie. Whatever it is, it’s not good and just convinces me more than ever that the Lindsay Lohan that we met in Parent Trap really is gone forever.
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| Joss Whedon Defends Buffy’s Tough Choice In The Season 9 Comic’s Latest Issue Posted: 09 Feb 2012 09:11 AM PST Warning: This has major spoilers for the Buffy season 9 comics. Maybe not as big as the identity of season 8′s baddie Twilight, but it’s still a dramatic turn that spoilerphobes will want to read for themselves in issue #6, which came out yesterday. Now that that’s over, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of “On Your Own, Part I”: Buffy decides to get an abortion. It’s astonishing that Joss Whedon‘s groundbreaking TV series, which brought an enduring feminist hero and introduced one of modern TV’s first openly gay relationships, never landed on the abortion issue. To be fair, Buffy was always a stickler for safe sex, whether physically or emotionally: Her relationships often ended in the guy dead, estranged, or evil. But it’s a different world in the Dark Horse comics, now in its second “season” after the series finale in 2003. Season 8 ended with Buffy destroying the seed of magic in the world, losing friends and allies after she’s the only Slayer again. She’s relocated to San Francisco and, as evidenced by the first arc “Freefall,” is struggling to figure out where she is. In a prior issue, she got black-out drunk at a party and apparently hooked up with someone, because last month she found out she’s pregnant.
That’s right: Buffy doesn’t know who her baby daddy is. Some fans are protesting such seemingly irresponsible behavior, but Whedon stands behind the decision, which he says they’ve been planning since they first mapped out season 9. In an extensive interview with Entertainment Weekly, he says that he believes getting pregnant is a “not uncommon” part of a woman’s early twenties. “I think that first of all that they should wait until they have all the facts and they'll learn stuff that they didn't know before,” he said. “They should find out what happened before they completely judge her. But at the same time, this is also about the time in your life when you do things that are irresponsible, or that you want to hold yourself to account for.” Of course, the other major supernatural pregnancy that this is getting compared to is Twilight—not that we’re saying it’s necessarily vampire sperm in Buffy’s case, but more because Stephenie Meyer played around with the pro-life/pro-choice debate in Breaking Dawn, Part 1. Although this was probably the opposite of her intention, because Bella decides to keep her vampire hybrid fetus even as it sucks out her life force, it makes her appear to the audience as some dead-eyed pro-life freak. Her “choice” to carry the baby, even if it means her back breaking and her body dying during labor, suddenly doesn’t seem like a choice at all. As The Mary Sue points out, this Buffy plotline actually shows readers a pregnant woman seriously considering both consequences of her situation—constantly switching back and forth between the issue of her own health and the inarguable truth that she would be ending a life. She’s clear-eyed enough to recognize her own shortcomings and her dangerous lifestyle, but her final decision to get an abortion is not one she arrives at easily. After the jump, Whedon’s thoughts on how pop culture and especially reality TV have glamorized teen moms who go through with pregnancies even when they’re appallingly unfit to take care of their babies. Plus, how the abortion won’t be as “normal” as you might think. Related posts: Post from: Crushable |
| My Geographically Undesirable, Yet Undeniable Crush On A Musician Posted: 09 Feb 2012 09:05 AM PST
I met Grant when I decided to go on a road trip to Nashville. My best friend Sarah, her boyfriend Kyle, and I sporadically hopped in my car and drove to Tennessee on a mission to find out what the big deal was about Music City. Sarah had a friend who lived in the area that said he'd take us out and show us a good time. We couldn't resist some guaranteed fun in a foreign city and off we went. I had heard about Grant many times from Sarah. I knew he was a musician and moved to Nashville to go to school for music business. I knew he had a cute grin. I knew he had charm that killed with the ladies. But I wasn't looking to meet any guys on this weekend trip, let alone one that would make my heart fall into my stomach, but when I wasn't looking—there was Grant. After we finally made it to Nashville and sat down to eat at dinner with Grant at a local Mexican restaurant, I knew this guy was special. His extraordinary lust for life drew me in immediately. I had to make this guy like me, not even in a romantic way, but just as a person. You know those kinds of people—they're funny, witty, bubbly. They take over the room and make everyone listen without asking. And you want that person to adopt you as their friend. That was Grant. As my friend Sarah and her boyfriend made googly-eyes at each other on their respective stools at a bar called Winners, I spent the night talking to Grant. With the mission to win this kid over, I flashed my brightest smile and flipped my hair in all the ways that seemed to work prior times with guys, but he seemed to look past all that. He actually wanted to know about more than just if I "liked to party" and what my major was. We shared pitchers of beer and talked about everything we could possibly fit into a few hours of conversation. I think I started to believe something was abrewin' with Grant when he confessed his dream job was to be a music supervisor—the same dream job as me. "It's kismet!" I squealed to Sarah in the bathroom. "It's totally kismet. Who else on the planet wants an obscure job like that?" "What the hell is kismet?" She asked, reapplying some lipgloss. "You're weird." I was weird. But so was Grant. I could work with this. Kismet: another word for fate or destiny. People like Grant don't just come into your life by accident or coincidence. I was convinced this was the Big Man upstairs doing me some favors. That night, I had my first big crush since high school. He had bombarded my life in an instant and now I couldn't remember the moments before him. I guess that's the thing about crushes—they just crash into your life unannounced and wreak havoc on your sanity and rationality in I drove back to Chicago with a heavy heart, knowing that this weekend was fleeting. Grant could never be anything that I wanted him to be. He came to visit my hometown once over the summer. We spent the night watching a Bob Dylan documentary and talking. We shared a sweet, innocent goodbye kiss that sent shivers through my body and off he went—back to Nashville. We still keep in touch and talk almost every day (sometimes for hours). He sends me songs that he says he writes for me, and This essay was submitted by Crushable reader Katie Garrity. You can follow her on Twitter @Katiegarrity. Related posts: Post from: Crushable |
| Let’s Discuss How Annoying Vanessa Hudgens Was On Late Night With Jimmy Fallon Posted: 09 Feb 2012 08:52 AM PST
Jimmy Fallon and Hudgens played a round of Shoe Golf and it was five minutes of awkwardness. Between all the squealing, whining, bizarre laugh and screaming of “hiya” over and over again, it was difficult not to squirm over it and stew in your own uncomfortableness on your couch. Hudgens had never played Shoe Golf before, but that doesn’t make up for all the noises she made. First of all, it’s a golf game in which shoes are being tossed, so the need to scream “hiya” is unnecessary because it’s not karate. Secondly, just because Jimmy is a pro at this game and is clearly kicking ass, it doesn’t mean that whining on national television is acceptable. Ever. Thirdly, how many times does one need to say “oh snap?” Didn’t that phrase go out in 2009? Perhaps I’m being too harsh; perhaps these are fundamental “cute” qualities in a girl and I just never got the memo. Perhaps I should have been taking notes? Watch the game in its entirety on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon‘s website and let me know what you think. Feedback, even when scathing, is always appreciated. Related posts: Post from: Crushable |
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Well hello there, lovely Jake!
Yesterday, 
Did you see Vanessa Hudgens on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night? If you missed it, you should consider yourself lucky. Unless you’re a big Hudgens fan, then maybe you would have enjoyed it.| You are subscribed to email updates from Crushable To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
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