Cele|bitchy

Masochist Robert Pattinson is “desperate for affection” from Kristen Stewart
Evan Rachel Wood vs. Camilla Belle: Who wore graphic Gucci better?
Reese Witherspoon vs. Kate Bosworth: who was the best dressed blonde?
Linnocent was denied at Leonardo DiCaprio’s party, acted “aggressive & random”
Jessica Simpson is Farty by name, Farty by nature

Masochist Robert Pattinson is “desperate for affection” from Kristen Stewart

Posted: 06 Nov 2011 08:09 AM PST

For a few months now, while Kristen Stewart has been filming Snow White and the Huntsman in England, I've been loosely keeping tabs on how often Robert Pattinson visits her. It hasn't been very often - he'll come in for a weekend every so often, but mostly K-Stew is without her boyfriend as she works in England. This lack of being-stuck-up-each-other's-bums has caused me to often wonder if they are close to shutting this romance down. Robert isn't working right now - he finished production on Cosmopolis weeks ago - and he just seems to be hanging out in LA a lot. I would imagine that he's taking meetings, hanging out with friends, and gearing up for Breaking Dawn promotion, but it's weird to me that two young people aren't spending more time together if they're in a relationship. Isn't that what being young is all about?

Anyway, Us Weekly has an interesting take on what's REALLY going on. Hint: it involves K-Stew being cold and withholding and Sparkles eating it up like a masochist.

In real life, Bella and Edward’s roles are reversed.

Insiders tell the new Us Weekly — on stands now — that Robert Pattinson is “desperate for affection” from Kristen Stewart.

“He is always worried about her leaving him,” a confidant of the 21-year-old actress tells Us.

“She will blow him off, and it makes him crazy,” adds the friend. While Pattinson, 25, admits he’s eager to settle down, Stewart is far from ready to walk down the aisle.

A friend of both the Breaking Dawn stars chalks it up to Stewart’s youth: “Don’t all people her age play games?”

For more on Rob and Kristen’s tortured two-and-a-half-year romance, check out the new Us Weekly, on stands now.

[From Us Weekly]

Do you buy this dynamic? I used to think this was what was going on, and I think Sparkles probably still feels like he's the one more prepared to "settle down" - that boy seems like a nester. But I don't think Sparkles is sitting around, waiting for whatever crumbs of affection K-Stew deigns to drop. At least, I hope he's not.

Meanwhile, Sparkles has a new interview in The Guardian, which you can read here. I've done some highlights below - he's as neurotic and charming as always. I love his interviews. He's like a pasty, English version of Woody Allen:

The Mark Hamill Career Trajectory: “It’s like being compared to people who’ve been in massive movies who just sort of disappear afterwards, even though they probably had incredibly fulfilling and successful lives,” he says, nibbling on a fingernail. “Like Luke Skywalker.” He scratches his head. “What the f–k’s his name?” Mark Hamill. “Yes! People are like: ‘Oh, the Mark Hamill curse.’ And poor Mark Hamill. Jesus Christ.” He tilts back in the chair and laughs, apparently oblivious to the state of his T-shirt. “I mean, I’m sure he did fine.”

Twilight was his safety net: “In career terms Twilight was like a security blanket,” Pattinson continues. Then he furrows his brow for a moment and corrects himself. “Not a blanket – a safety net. I had a three- or four-month window between each one during which I could do another job. But whatever I did I knew that I’d have another Twilight movie on the way, which is theoretically guaranteed to make a lot of money. So I could always afford to fail.” Now the net is gone. The stakes have been raised. He once described choosing roles as “crippling”. “After the last one comes out, you can kind of have two failures – and they’d better be low-budget failures. Because if you have one big-budget failure you’re pretty much done in this environment.”

He admires Kristen Stewart's career: “It’s different for Kristen, for example… She doesn’t think about it like that at all, because she grew up gradually, doing independent movies and stepping up the ladder, whereas I was doing progressively smaller movies in England, after Harry Potter… to the point where I was doing nine-day shoots for, like, 20p and a packet of Space Invaders. And then this happened. So I’m not just another actor who’s around and jobbing. When you hire me for a job, you’re hiring…” Twilight guy? “Yeah. I’m now this ‘thing’ that’s supposed to be something. And if you then don’t fulfill that expectation, what the f–k are you?”

Being cast in Twilight - and the audition was his first time with Xanex: Apparently he had the X-factor Hardwicke was looking for: as far as Pattinson was concerned, that X stood for Xanax. “I’d never had a Xanax before,” he says, looking guilty for a moment. “But I’d started getting so paranoid about messing up auditions all the time that I would actually mess them up. So I took like half a Xanax. And it went really well, so when I had to go and meet the producers I thought: I’m just going to take another Xanax!” He laughs and rocks his chair. “And then I went in and almost fell asleep.”

In the end: “If I do decide one day to stop acting, I just hate the idea of people going: ‘Oh, did you ever do anything else besides that Twilight thing?’”

[From The Guardian]

Poor Sparkles. I don't think he'll be Mark Hamill'd. I think after Breaking Dawn, he'll have a few off-years where he gives solid performances in small films and weak performances in bigger films, and then the second wave will occur when he gets a good part that's well-written and it will be his second big break. Now, Kristen, on the other hand. I have no idea what her career future will be, but it will be interesting to see if she's still relevant in five years.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Evan Rachel Wood vs. Camilla Belle: Who wore graphic Gucci better?

Posted: 06 Nov 2011 07:30 AM PST

Here are some more photos from that LACMA tribute event to Clint Eastwood - both Evan Rachel Wood and Camilla Belle came out for the event, and both wore Gucci (Gucci was the sponsor). Let's talk about Evan first, because… obviously. She's the bigger star, and there's more to talk about. First, her dress - I think this "flapper" style suits her figure very well, and the gold and black works. I'm honestly not crazy about the dress, but I'm giving Evan a pass because she's the kind of girl who can make items (that I don't care for) work in interesting ways.

A few weeks ago, I complimented Evan's makeup work while she was in London, promoting The Ides of March with George Clooney. Her makeup guy Toby Fleischman got in touch with us and thanked us for noticing - you can see his website here. If you want me to ask him about Evan’s styling and makeup, just tell me and I’ll email him. Once again, Evan's got the kind of look where she can pull off stuff that I'm not usually crazy about - on anyone else, I would think her eye makeup is too dark for such a pale girl. But if you really look at the whole outfit, and the entirety of her styling, the makeup is helping. It's her hair that bugs me. But her hair is so short now, and if she had poofed it up instead of doing these structured "flapper waves" I think it would have been worse. There's not much else she can do, so at least she went for consistency with the whole look. And I absolutely LOVE her nails and her earrings.

And onto to Camilla Belle. Camilla's dress looks a lot like Evan's in colors and graphic theme. I think Evan wears it better, and I dislike Camilla's hair more than I dislike Evan's hair. Oh, and did Camilla’s maekup guy attempt WHITE cat-eyes? Evan and Camilla both have great figures, though. Sigh…

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Reese Witherspoon vs. Kate Bosworth: who was the best dressed blonde?

Posted: 06 Nov 2011 06:42 AM PST

Last night, there was a big gala honoring Clint Eastwood at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art - it was called the LACMA Art + Film Gala, and Gucci was the sponsor. Most of the girls in attendance wore Gucci, but not Reese Witherspoon, one of the biggest "names" in attendance. Reese wore this figure-hugging Cushnie et Ochs dress, which I do like. It's a very pretty LBD, and it looks great on Reese's body. I don't know, though - it's a little va-va-voom for Reese, though. I like that as she's gotten older, her red carpet fashion seems to have simplified a great deal, and she definitely favors cleaner lines and more modern silhouettes, but it feels like she's trying and failing to be seen as sexier too, right? She's not Reese, The Girl Next Door anymore. Now she's trying to be Reese, the Bombshell With Sex Appeal. Also, I don't care for the gigantic hair bun.

Also at the event: Kate Bosworth, with her "life partner"-slash-boyfriend of a few months, Michael Polish. The Bos wore this pale yellow Erdem that… looks really good on her. The Bos really is a Fashion Girl, you know. She knows a lot about fashion, and she knows how to get dressed for a red carpet. Most of the time. Honestly, looking through the photos from the event, I thought The Bos was one of the best-dressed ladies there. This Erdem softens her, and I swear she's put on a pound or two.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Linnocent was denied at Leonardo DiCaprio’s party, acted “aggressive & random”

Posted: 06 Nov 2011 06:14 AM PST

Another sad, pathetic cracktastrosphe in the sad, pathetic life of Lindsay Lohan. You know how Judge Sautner gave LL a week's leniency to finish up her "work"? Well, Linnocent considers crashing Hollywood parties "work" - now we know. In Friday's Hilary Swank post, I noted that all of the photos were from the AFI Fest premiere of J. Edgar in LA the previous night. It seems that after the premiere, there was a little party for the cast and Clint Eastwood-supporters and friends. And Linnocent thought she was invited, of course. Cracken chaos ensued:

Troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan crashed the party for Leonardo DiCaprio's movie "J. Edgar" and made such a scene she made A-list attendees "uncomfortable."

Lohan, fresh from her Playboy shoot and about to go to jail for probation violations, insisted she was an invited guest to the party for the Clint Eastwood-directed biopic about legendary FBI director Hoover, and talked her way past security at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel on Thursday night.

A source at the bash told us, "Lindsay was arguing with the security to let her in, dropping every celebrity's name to get in. She could be heard saying, 'I have to go and see Leo.' Eventually they let her in, but she made everybody uncomfortable. She was aggressive and random, storming around. She tried to get to Leo, but he was surrounded by his security and a posse of his friends. Clint and Leo and Dustin Lance Black were talking, and Lindsay sent one of her aides over, demanding to get a photo with them, but security shooed them away."

Another spy at the party, attended by Ron Howard, Harvey Weinstein, Brett Ratner and actress/producer Christie Cashman, said Lohan kept asking to meet Oscar-winning producer Brian Grazer, who'd already left.

The movie, generating considerable Oscar buzz for DiCaprio, opened the AFI Fest at Grauman's Chinese Theater. It wasn't clear how Lohan managed to get past AFI security, which sealed off the whole block and would only allow their official limos in.

Lohan has to turn herself in to jail by Wednesday to serve a 30-day sentence. But this didn't stop her from turning up at the Hollywood Roosevelt with her hair and makeup still done up from her earlier Playboy shoot.

Lohan's rep said, "She did not crash, she was invited by a guest who attended the event. I am not aware of her asking for photos with Leo or Clint. She was never asked to leave." Reps for DiCaprio and Grazer declined to comment.

[From Page Six]

“I WANT TO MEET RON HOWARD. BRING ME MARTY SCORSESE! I NEED TO TELL CLINT EASTWOOD TO TAKE A MEETING WITH ME! IS THAT SPIELBERG ON THE PHONE?!?” - Things Overheard When Linnocent Is Doing Blow And Talking To Ali In Her Crack Den.

What's the over-under on Linnocent actually being invited to that kind of party? If you told me that one of those Hollywood power players hired her as an end-of-the-night hooker AFTER he left the party, I would believe that. But she's not getting invited to these parties with these kinds of people. Dlisted has a photo of Linnocent Thursday night too - she got her hair did and her crack lips painted for the occasion and everything. Pathetic.

But! You know that back in 2009, there were rumors about Leonardo and Linnocent, right? True story - she might have given him a lap dance, and they might have hooked up, before she was a full-blown cracktastrophe. Would Leo still hit that? No, he wouldn't. Even if he was in the mood for something less than a supermodel, I doubt he would sink as far as The Cracken.

Meanwhile, Crack Mother of the Year Dina Lohan gave an interview about LL's Playboy shoot. Dina said, “It was an opportunity for her. She’s 25 years old now, so it was her ultimate decision. It will be tastefully done. I’ve seen [the photos]. She’s really great in front of the camera." She's 25 years old now? WHAT?!? I thought "25" was still considered "crack baby" in Dina Lohan's mind? Isn't that what she's always saying - that LL is just a CHILD and we must treat her as such? Dina also talked about Linnocent's legal troubles, saying: “It’s been four years of torture, we just want this over. She witnessed a lot of things that were traumatizing [at the morgue]… But certainly we’re at a fortunate place.” Seriously? Just wait until LL screws up again.

Here are some pics of LL last night in Venice Beach. She smokes Parliaments?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Jessica Simpson is Farty by name, Farty by nature

Posted: 06 Nov 2011 04:06 AM PST

Jessica Simpson has always been farty. So much so that we named her Farty. I always make up different last names for her - sometimes she's Farty McObvious, Farty McDumbass, and one of my favorites, Farty McMallHair. At this point, Farty is a term of endearment. She's pretty and pregnant and not that bright, but I want her to do well and live well and prosper. And I want her to be as gassy as she needs to be, even if that means farting in the middle of a business meeting and getting yelled at by her mother. Anyway, Jessica knows her FARTY (and gross) reputation, and she's in on the joke too. How else to explain this tweet?

[From Jessica's Twitter]

I love her. I can only guess that she's so much worse, so much grosser, so much gassier now that she's pregnant. Eric Johnson is probably reconsidering this whole "Let me trap my fiancée into having my baby OH DEAR GOD WHAT'S THAT SMELL DID SOMETHING DIE?" plan.

So what's the lesson here? Don't stand downwind of Farty McPregnant.

Photos courtesy of Fame, WENN.

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